The Mornin' Mail is published every weekday except major holidays
Tuesday, March 18, 2008 Volume XVI, Number 192

did ya know?

Did Ya Know?... The Carthage Human Society has new operating hours. They are open Monday through Friday noon until 6:00 P.M. and Saturday from 10:00 A.M. until 3:00 P.M.

Did Ya Know?... The Jasper Christian Church is inviting the public to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus with a special "Sunrise Service" at 7:00 a.m. on Sunday Morning, March 23. at 213 E Grand Ave, Jasper, Mo. For further information call 417-394-2413 or 417-394-3040.

Did Ya Know?... The First Assembly of God in Carthage will hold an Eggs & Issues on March 28th at 7:00 AM. City and R-9 candidates will be there answering questions over breakfast.

today's laugh

Teacher - "Alfred, you may spell the word neighbor."

Alfred - "N-e-i-g-h-b-o-r."

Teacher - "That’s right. Now, Tommy, can you tell me what a neighbor is?

Tommy - "Yes, ma’am. It’s a woman that borrows things."

Teacher - "Johnny, can you tell me what a waffle is?"

Johnny - "Yes’m, it’s a pancake with a non-skid tread."

A distant relative is one who recently borrowed money from you.

A Chronological Record of Events as they have Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.

Bell Has A New Board in Use.

Telephone Company Completes $20,000 Improvement.

The Missouri & Kansas Telephone Co. has finished installing its new $20,000 multiple electric switchboard, and the young men of the Western Electric Co. of New York who have been in the city for the past three months doing the work under Supt. Moore, left yesterday morning.

Since the installation of the new switchboard the "hello girls" have been instructed in the method of responding to the electric light signal calls from patrons by an expert operator who was sent here by the company.

The interior of the Bell office is being handsomely repapered and painted. The only portion unfinished at present is the general office room.

The new switchboard is a handsome affair. It is of South American mahogany and is of the latest improved electric type, built to accommodate 1500 subscribers. It can be made with but little change to accommodate 2500 lines, so the company feels this board should be large enough to handle the Carthage business for some time to come. Eight operators are required to operate the board, besides the chief operator and those on long distance board.

With the interior of the plant completed, the company will begin in the near future to rebuild its outside equipment. When this work is finished there will be no overhead wires of the Bell company in the city except at the points where the wires will be "dropped" from a box to enter a residence. All the wires elsewhere will be distributed over the city in large cables. All the wires and cables which are being used at present will be torn down and replaced with new ones.

When the interior and exterior work is all completed the Carthage exchange, it is declared by the company, will be one of the most complete telephone systems in the southwest.


Today's Feature

Public Works Meeting Today.

The City Council Public Works Committee will meet this afternoon at 4:00 p.m. in the Public Works Department Building, 627 E. 3rd. Items on the agenda include the discussion of bids for the removal of vegetation on three North Garrison bridges. Bids were opened on Friday, March 14th. The committee is also scheduled to discuss stump grinding quotes and a request for trash exemption status.

"Odd Couple" at Stone’s Throw.

Stone’s Throw Theatre, Carthage, Mo. is proud to announce they will be presenting Neil Simon’s ODD COUPLE (FEMALE VERSION). Additional Funding is provided by Missouri Arts Council and Schmidt and Associates.

Performances will be at Stone’s Throw Theatre, 796 South Stone Lane, Carthage, Mo. on April 3-5 and April 11-13, 2008. Thursdays through Saturdays doors will open at 6:00 P.M., Dinner at 6:30 and the show starts at 7:30. On Sundays the doors open at 12:30 P.M. Lunch at 1:00 and the show at 2:00. Price is $20.00 for adults, $19.00 for Seniors over 55 , $17.00 for under 16, and children under 5 are free. Reservations can be made by calling Betty Bell at 417-358-7268 or the theatre at 417-358-9665 or on line at

They’re at it again! But this time we see the female point of view. Come join us as Olive and Florence battle it out for apartment supremacy in Neil Simon’s "The Odd Couple" (Female Version). It promises to be a night full of obsessive cleanliness, awkward dates, and airborne Italian dishes, all in good fun. Sit in on the action and see who finally wins out in this hilarious battle of wills: Clean vs. Dirty, Dainty vs. Disgusting, Uptight vs. Easygoing, all in the name of "friendship". Who’s going to win this over-the-top, overheated argument? Come find out and join the fun as Stone’s Throw Dinner Theatre presents The Odd Couple (Female Version).

Imma Curl (Joplin) who has been involved with off Broadway productions is the director for this delightful and funny show. Sonya Kew (Joplin) and Krista Thompson (Carthage) have the starring roles as Olive and Florence. Rounding out the cast in funny quirky characters as only Neil Simon can create are Becky Gooch (Joplin), Carole Lenger (Joplin), Roberta Shilane (Joplin), Elisia Conrardy (Carthage), Pete Schlau (Joplin), and Jonathon Peck (Joplin).

Just Jake Talkin'

I see the flat-top hair cut is an available option again. Course for some it never went out of style.

It’s been several years since you’d see one except on occasion though.

I can understand why the flat-top is becomin’ more popular, it can look very well kept without a lot of hassle. The Beatles put a halt to it last time I guess.

It’s amazing ta see how short those long hair mops were when ya look at old pictures. I’ll bet the barber schools had a hay-day retrainin’ for the new style back then. ‘Course I suppose most just had a buddy whack on it ever now and then.

I don’t know that I’ve seen a flat-top toupee. Looks like it’d be a natural. You could use a little Butch Wax ta hold it on with too. Just don’t get caught in the sun.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’.

Mornin' Mail

To Your Good Health
By Paul G. Donohue, M.D.

Reversing Artery Buildup

DEAR DR. DONOHUE: What happens to artery buildup when one stops eating trans fats? -- M.C.

ANSWER: It takes a lot of work to reverse artery buildup, but it can be done if a person carefully watches the amount of saturated fat, trans fat and cholesterol eaten. You have to do other things too. You have to keep blood pressure in the normal range. You have to exercise regularly. You can’t smoke.


DEAR DR. DONOHUE: I caught my fingers in a closing door. Two fingernails have turned black. I don’t want my nails pulled off. How can I get them back to normal? -- S.F.

ANSWER: If the black is pooled blood, a doctor can bore a tiny hole into the nail and let it out. If the blood has congealed, it has to stay there and you have to wait until it’s absorbed by the body, which will happen in time. That might take a couple of months.

If the nails themselves have become discolored, then it takes six months for a new nail to grow from the base to the nail tip.


DEAR DR. DONOHUE: I am 67 and have high blood pressure, high cholesterol and arthritic knees. Walking was my favorite exercise, but knee pain now prevents that. What exercise would be best for my knees? -- R.C.

ANSWER: Swimming would be the ideal exercise. Even if you don’t know how, 67 is not too old to learn. You also could do water aerobics -- exercising in the water. Water provides buoyancy that protects your knees.


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