The Mornin' Mail is published every weekday except major holidays
Thursday, March 20, 2008 Volume XVI, Number 194

did ya know?

Did Ya Know?... The Jasper Christian Church is inviting the public to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus with a special "Sunrise Service" at 7:00 a.m. on Sunday Morning, March 23. at 213 E Grand Ave, Jasper, Mo. For further information call 417-394-2413 or 417-394-3040.

Did Ya Know?... The First Assembly of God in Carthage will hold an Eggs & Issues on March 28th at 7:00 AM. City and R-9 candidates will be there answering questions over breakfast.

Did Ya Know?... The Carthage Chamber is hosting a Small Business Expo at the Memorial Hall, April 18th from 1:00PM-6:00PM and April 19th from 9:00AM-3:00PM. Space is limited so call Amber to register your business at 358-2373.

today's laugh

The ten-year-old son of a physician, together with a friend, was playing in his father’s office, during the absence of the doctor, when suddenly the first lad threw open a closet door and disclosed to the terrified gaze of his little friend and articulated skeleton.

When the visitor had sufficiently recovered from his shock to stand the announcement the doctor’s son explained that his father was extremely proud of that skeleton.

"Is he?" asked the other. "Why?"

"I don’t know," was the answer; "maybe it was his first patient."

A Chronological Record of Events as they have Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.

Loans and Warrants.

County Court Rescinds Action on First and Orders Payment of Claims.

Among the business matters which came before the county judges during the closing session of county court Saturday evening was the rescinding of a school fund loan of $800, which had been allowed to J. T. Headles on January 2. The warrant covering the loan was burned in court. A swamp land school fund loan of $200 to Jackson Brown was also ordered rescinded.

The following warrants were ordered drawn by the court:

Special road fund – W. T. Simmons, $168.10 for special road work in Sheridan township.

Salary fund – E. H. Chitwood, $231.60 for preparing poll list; C. W. Dykeman, Allen Dison and Tom Brock, $30 each for six days attendance as judges of the county court.


Today's Feature

Reviewed Adult Video Ordinance.

The Jasper County Commission on Wednesday morning reviewed a proposed ordinance aimed at regulating sexually oriented businesses. As of Wednesday afternoon no action had been taken by the Commission concerning the ordinance, however the draft had been signed by all three commissioners indicating that they had all read it.

The ordinance if approved would provide for a licensing process for sexually oriented businesses, which includes guidelines for hours of operation, duties of the licensee to monitor operations, and restrictions for video viewing rooms.

A previous ordinance approved by the Commission similarly provided restrictions for "adult cabarets," which was propelled by a citizen group against a business that intended to open a juice bar and trucker’s lounge. The same business owner has recently applied to open an adult video and book store, and the proposed ordinance would impact that business if approved.

The Commissioners are scheduled to continue discussions concerning the ordinance today, though Presiding Commissioner John Bartosh said he did not know if any decision would be made.

Just Jake Talkin'


I like a rockin’ chair that makes a little noise when ya rock. That creakin’ sound some how soothes the nerves of those doin’ the rockin’ but highly irritates those within hearin’ distance.

Never have figured why someone makin’ a noise is never bothered by it. Nothin’ more irritatin’ than someone clickin a ball point pen. Click..Click.Click..Click.

Course if ya want ta have some real fun, take a ball point along with ya next time ya sit in a rockin’ chair.


Those with real talent and coordination can tap their foot and smack their gum at the same time.

I suppose the rocker went out of style ‘bout the time ball points were invented.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’.

Metcalf Auto Supply

Click & Clack Talk Cars
By Tom & Ray Magliozzi

Dear Tom and Ray:

Please help me. I have a 1996 Honda Accord that runs great - no complaints. However, this morning, coming back to my car in a parking lot, I noticed some long hair or fur hanging out from my exhaust pipe. I removed some of it, and a kind gentleman pulled some more out and thought he got all of it. After driving 60 miles back home, I parked the car in the garage and noticed a lot more hair/fur hanging out of the same exhaust pipe. It is long, soft-black/gray/white hair or fur. I noticed a foul smell in the trunk as I was getting the groceries out. Please, what could this be, and how did something - an animal of some kind - get in there? Did it get in from another part of the car, like somewhere under the hood? I am afraid to touch the car again. Who do I go to or call to get this taken car of? Thank you so much. - Linda

TOM: Call the Hair Club for Men, Linda. You might be able to sell this stuff and supplement your income.

RAY: Did the "kind gentleman" happen to mention anything about being a president and a client? He might have been Sy Sperling.

TOM: What you’ve got actually is something we refer to as muffler hair, Linda. It seems to be unique to Hondas. At least, those are the only cars we’ve seen with the flowing muffler locks.

RAY: Honda apparently uses some sort of insulation in its mufflers that looks an awful lot like human or animal hair. It’s not hair. It’s probably fiberglass, or some such thing. It’s used to keep the baffles in the muffler from rattling when the muffler starts to get old and the parts loosen up.

TOM: But when the interior of the muffler really begins to disintegrate, the baffles no longer hold the insulation (i.e., muffler hair) in place, and it gets pushed out the tailpipe. So, it means you need a new muffler, Linda. In the meantime, try putting it up in a bun or something so it doesn’t look unruly.


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