A preacher was
completing a temperance sermon with great expression he
said, "If I had all the beer in the world, Id
take it and throw it into the river." With even
greater emphasis he said, "And if I had all the wine
in the world, Id take it and throw it into the
And then finally, he said, "And if
I had all the whiskey in the world, Id take it and
throw it into the river."
He sat down.
The song leader then stood very
cautiously and announced with a smile,
"For our closing song, let us sing
Hymn # 365: "Shall We Gather at the River."
"Wed like to thank you folks
for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the
insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a
pressurized metal tube, we hope youll think of US
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Wanted for Knocking a
A city warrant is out for Ed Thompson,
a night porter at the Harrington, charging him with
assault, but Ed cant be found and the officers
suppose that he has left town. The complaining witness is
Myrtle Crow, a girl with whom Thompson has been keeping
company for years. She says that through jealousy he
struck her three times and knocked her down about 7:30
last night. The affair happened out by the city light
plant as the girl was going home from work. Officers were
soon after Ed but the latter was probably expecting them
and had left town.
John Harian yesterday sold to George
Palmer a 40-acre farm three miles east of Reeds for $600.
U. S. Leggett sold J. A. Daugherty 80
acres of land lying five miles northeast of Asbury.
The Hit Musical
GODSPELL is coming to Carthage, Mo.
Stones Throw Theatre,
Carthage, Mo. is proud to announce they will be
presenting GODSPELL conceived by John Michael
Tubelak with music by Steven Swartz. GODSPELL is
produced by special permission from Theatre
Maximus. Additional Funding is provided by
Missouri Arts Council and Schmidt and Associates.
Performances will be at
Stones Throw Theatre, 796 South Stone Lane,
Carthage, Mo. on Oct. 16-18 and 21-25, 2009. On
weekdays the doors will open at 6:00 P.M., Dinner
at 6:30 and the show starts at 7:30. On Sunday,
the doors open at 12:30 P.M. Lunch at 1:00 and
the show at 2:00. Price is $22.00 for adults,
$19.00 for Seniors over 55 , $10.00 for youth
under 17, and children under 5 are free. Groups
of 10 and over are $18.00.
Large groups should reserve
early. Reservations can be made by calling Betty
Bell at 417-358-7268 , the theatre at
417-358-9665 or on line at firstname.lastname@example.org.
NASCAR THIS WEEK
By Monte Dutton
by Curry Automotive
A Difficult Year for
For Kevin Harvick, its
been a rough year. For Harvicks team,
Richard Childress Racing, its been a rough
Harvick and his teammates --
Clint Bowyer, Jeff Burton and Casey Mears -- are
all trapped outside the Chase for the Sprint Cup,
hoping that a victory will earn some attention in
a setting where the 12 contenders make everyone
else seem irrelevant by comparison.
Notwithstanding a recent
runner-up finish at Atlanta, Harvick and his No.
29 Shell/Pennzoil Chevrolet have been
significantly off their game. A 32nd-place finish
in New Hampshire left Harvick 22nd in the Sprint
Cup point standings. Hes finished in the
top five only three times all year, and his
top-10 finishes number only five.
A year ago, all three RCR
Chevys (a fourth was added before this season)
made the Chase. Harvick, who is from Bakersfield,
Calif., finished fourth in the final point
standings, but he hasnt actually won since
the 2007 Daytona 500.
"Well, our cars have run
fairly well for the last seven, eight
weeks," said Harvick, 33. "We just wind
up wrecked or something stupid happening for the
last little while. Seems like everything
thats been happening has just kind of piled
"You know, any momentum is
in a good ... in a good direction is a positive
thing for us. It lets us know that we do remember
how to race, just overcome a lot of things and
hopefully keep it going."
Harvick made those remarks
after the second-place finish on Sept. 6 at
Atlanta Motor Speedway. Since then, hes
finished ninth at Richmond and 32nd at New
Childress, a former driver who
enjoyed his greatest success while the late Dale
Earnhardt was winning six of his seven
championships in his cars, has had to face a
cutback in support from General Motors. He said
recently that he expects to field four Chevrolets
again next year.
"Who knows what will
happen? There are a lot of things moving forward,
you know. I look around the garage, and
theres some of the press and some of the
other companies that were in here that have made
cutbacks, too," said Childress.
"Weve all just got to adjust for these
times, and racing is no different.
"Were in the greatest
country in the world, and we will survive
Monte Dutton has covered
motorsports for The Gaston (N.C.) Gazette since
1993. He was named writer of the year by the
National Motorsports Press Association in 2008.
Ive never actually
seen a woodshed. I say that with
qualification cause I guess I
wouldnt know one if I saw it.
I grew up hearin
thats where kids were taken when they
were bad and needed a little discipline.
In this day and age, I
dont want ta get into a discussion
bout whether gittin a
lickin is a proper activity, Im
just curious as to the origination of
"take ya out to the woodshed."
I suppose that rather than
a buildin ta store firewood, it was the
storage of lumber. That would be a handy spot
for a paddle to be procured. This makes a lot
more sense now, I have been troubled with the
thought of the usin of tree limbs as
implements of corporal punishment.
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
|Sponsored by Metcalf
CLICK and CLACK
by Tom & Ray
Dear Tom and Ray:
I have a 2001 Toyota 4Runner
with 160,000 miles. I also have a pop-up camper
that I pull on occasion with the 4Runner. I just
made a trip from Colorado up to Minnesota pulling
the camper. The last 20 percent of the trip, when
traveling on the interstate, the 4Runner started
bouncing pretty good - so much that my daughter
thought she was riding the horsey ride at the
grocery store. I jumped up and down on the hitch
and it continued to bounce a couple of times
before stopping. Do I need new shocks?
Ray: Well, lets assume
youve already checked the tires, Keith, to
make sure theyre not overinflated.
Tom: Wait! Lets not
assume! Keith, check the tires, including the
trailer tires, to make sure theyre not
overinflated, because thats a very common
cause of bouncing and poor ride quality.
Ray: But if the tires are
inflated correctly, heres the test. Unhook
the trailer. Then put a foot on the rear bumper
and stand up on it, holding on to the roof rack
Tom: Then start bouncing up and
down on the bumper. Get it really rocking - up
and down, up and down, as far down as you can
make it go. Then, when its at the bottom of
the cycle, hop off.
Ray: The bumper should come
back up to its normal position and stop dead in
Tom: If the truck continues to
go up and down at all, you need shocks. Bad
shocks can certainly cause the kind of bouncing
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