What did the
skeleton say to the bartender?
Ill have a beer and a MOP!
An elderly couple had been experiencing
declining memories, so they decided to take a power
memory class where one is taught to remember things by
A few days after the class, the old man
was outside talking with his neighbor about how much the
class helped him.
"What was the name of the
Instructor?" asked the neighbor.
"Oh, ummmm, lets see,"
the old man pondered. "You know that flower, you
know, the one that smells really nice but has those
prickly thorns, whats that flowers
"A rose?" asked the neighbor.
"Yes, thats it,"
replied the old man. He then turned toward his house and
shouted, "Hey, Rose, whats the name of the
Instructor we took the memory class from?"
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
BUILT FIRST COURT
Lemuel McIntire, a Jasper county
pioneer who was driven north at the beginning of the
civil war, is back here on a visit and tells the paper
some interesting reminiscences, throwing a little light
on the early history of the county. He is from Polk
county, Iowa, is eighty-one years of age, and will return
home next week after a visit here with his son, James
McIntire, up the river east of town.
Mr. McIntire settled in the river
country east of Carthage in 1838. This section was then
in Barry county, but a few years later when Jasper county
was cut off and organized, speculators fixed on a point
three miles west of Carthage, down the river, as the
geographical center and probable government seat of the
new county. They laid off a town, called it Jasper, and
Mr. McIntire built a small house of split logs, with flat
side out. This building was soon afterward used by the
first county officers, and Mr. McIntire therefore claims
the honor of having erected the first court house in
That town of Jasper soon faded off the
map and Carthage grew. The war came, and Mr. McIntire
went, leaving his property in charge of his nephew, John
Hornback. After the war he returned from Illinois to fix
up his property rights, then moved to Iowa and Kansas,
where he has resided ever since.
The old gentlemen states that this was
the best country on earth for the poor man to get a
start, little or no capital being required. Only the
frightful war drove him away. "And I believe yet
that theres just about as good opportunities for
young men just beginning in life here now as there was
then, or as there are now anywhere else on earth."
Back on Track.
The Carthage Police Department
will be holding its 17th "Citizens
Police Academy" starting on October 15th.
The Classroom sessions will be each Thursday
night from 7 PM to 9 PM. Practical exercise
classes will begin at 6:30 PM.
Registration forms for the
academy are available at the Carthage Police
Department at 310 W. 4th Street, or the
Department may be called at 237-7200 and a
registration form will be mailed.
Detective Steve Waldo, the CPA
coordinator, recommends that due to limited class
size that interested citizens complete an
application as soon as possible.
There is no fee for this
community awareness program. The academy is
designed to give the public a better
understanding of their police agency, as well as
an opportunity to experience the day to day life
of a police officer. Students are permitted to
participate in a ride along program as long as
they sign the required waivers. Other topics
include DWI and drug enforcement, firearm safety,
meth lab investigations, use of force and non
Questions can be addressed to
any member of the Police Department.
I grew up hearin ya
gota jump in and start swimmin. The
idea bein that ya cant sit around
waitin for somethin ta happen.
Course, as water
safety folks will explain, its not such a
good idea to jump in head first if ya
arent familiar with the swimmin
Im guessin that
most folks have felt they got in a little
deeper than they anticipated ever now
and then. Thats when the rest of the
lesson comes in. "Learn from your
mistakes and go on."
I suppose that havin
an attitude that gettin your feet a
little wet now and then is a good thing.
Id hate ta think that everthing
has been tried thats worth tryin.
Itd be a shame ta not have anything
left ta learn.
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
|Sponsored by Carthage
HERES A TIP
"If you are making
cookies with raisins, do yourself a favor and
soak them in hot water for about 10 minutes prior
to using. I had never done this before, and my
sister-in-law suggested it. It makes such a
difference. The raisins get plump and
juicy." -- A Reader, via e-mail from
looking for ways to jazz up recipes for chicken,
since we eat it so much. I like to bread chicken
cutlets in different things, and a suggestion
from a friend that I recently tried was
delicious! To add flavor to chicken breading, use
a tablespoon of a dry seasoning packet, such as
one for making Italian or ranch dressing. They
have a lot of flavor and really change the taste
of fried chicken." -- R.L. in Tennessee
about the neighborhood with the little ones in
their wagon one evening, we decided that the
wagon needed some taillights. We made a loop out
of duct tape, plucked a couple of our
solar-powered landscape lights and stuck them in
the loops. Now if we go out in the evening, we
just grab a couple of the landscape lights and
put them in the loops. We are adding additional
loops for trick-or-treating." -- A.C.M. in
If youve moved,
you might have a mountain of now-outdated address
labels. You can use them to close freezer paper
for storing meat packages -- just use them like
stickers. Also, you can use a thick permanent
marker to write a date on them for other packages
in the freezer.
Go Green Tip: Some items
to dispose of properly (never in the trash):
paint and paint solvents, antifreeze or motor
oil, other shop chemicals and batteries. Purchase
only what you can use, and check first for local
recyclers accepting these items, then for proper
toxic drop-off sites.
Copyright 1997-2009 by Heritage
Publishing. All rights reserved.