A man goes to a doctor
for a routine physical. The nurse starts with the basics.
"How much do you weigh?" she
"Oh, about 165." he says.
The nurse puts him on the scale. It
turns out that his weight is 187. The nurse asks,
"Oh, about six feet," he
The nurse checks and sees that
hes only 5 feet 8 3/4 inches. She then takes his
blood pressure, and its very high.
"High!" The man explains,
"Of course its high. When I came in here, I
was tall and lanky. Now, Im short and fat!"
If we could just get everyone to close
their eyes and visualize world peace for an hour, imagine
how serene and quiet it would be until the looting
started. Age 15
A telephone rang. "Hello! Is your
phone number 444-4444?"
"Yes, it is," came the reply.
"Thank God! Could you call 911 for
me? I super-glued my finger to the phone."
Bow legs may be few, but far between.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
J.T. Batts who recently became
interested in the Anderson Radiator & Stove Co. has
now secured an interest in the Parrot cooking stove and
the Eagle heater patents which cover Canada, and will
leave the 15th of February for Toronto where he will
organize a company to manufacture the stoves.
He will work on the Parrot cook stove
first as he already has models of that make. The heater
is not yet perfected and he will not work on that until
later. Hamilton and Toronto will be the two points worked
first and from there to Montreal and Winnipeg. Mr. Batts
hopes to get his work far enough advanced to enable him
to go to the Paris Exposition and take an exhibit of the
new stoves with him. He is thoroughly posted on Canadian
affairs, knows the country and people well and being a
good business man, will be more than likely to succeed in
his new undertaking.
2nd Annual Fall
The Carthage Family Y 2nd
Annual Fall Ball will be held at the Carthage
Municipal Golf Course this Friday, August 20th.
Tickets may be purchased from
one of the Y Board members or at the Ys
front desk at a cost of $5 for one, 3 golf balls
for $10, or 6 for $20. Anyone who purchases 6
golf balls for $20 gets dinner included.
There will also be a Chipping
contest from 10:00 a.m.-5:00 p.m., Dinner (Hot
Dogs/Chips/Drink) at 5:00 p.m. & the Ball
Drop right around dinner time.
The person who has his/her golf
ball go in the bottom of cup or the closest to
the cup in the event that no ball makes it into
the cup, will win $1,000 cash.
All proceeds benefit the YMCA.
See one of these Y Board
Members to buy a ticket: Travis Almandinger, Bill
Phelps, Dr. Mark Baker, Catie Platt, Chuck
Bryant, Danny Ross, Tom Carlton, Patrick Scott,
Cheryl Calhoon, Dean Sexton, GA Flesher, Nancy
Frerer, Susan Williams, Lea Ann Keeling, Steve
Wilson, John Nicholas.
NASCAR THIS WEEK
By Monte Dutton
Sponsored by Chad's Garage
Allmendinger Wants to be "Top
A.J. Allmendinger hasnt
enjoyed many NASCAR weekends as successful as the
one he just completed in Watkins Glen, N.Y.
The Los Gatos, Calif., native
was highly successful in the Champ Car World
Series, but the Sprint Cup Series has been a
struggle since he joined Team Red Bull in 2007
and Richard Petty Motorsports in 2009.
Allmendinger finished 24th in the 2009 Sprint Cup
point standings and currently resides in 22nd
Just days after Petty and
Foster Gillett of RPM announced that
Allmendingers contract as driver of the No.
43 Ford has been extended, he celebrated by
finishing fourth in the Heluva Good at the Glen.
His career best, by the way, was a third in the
2009 Daytona 500.
"We are definitely not
where we want to be ... right now, but I see the
potential and want to keep building a team around
me that continues to get better," said
Allmendinger, 28. "We want to reach a point
where we compete for a win every weekend and
hopefully, eventually, get a championship. That
is the goal."
A championship is certainly a
long way off, but Allmendinger doesnt shy
away from the task at hand. He said he talked to
other teams, but decided to remain at RPM, in
part, because of Kasey Kahnes departure at
Allmendinger wants to be
"Yeah, that was a big
selling point," he said. "I am ready to
be a leader of this race team. Its
something that I thrive on and excites me every
day to know that I can be the guy. I have the
confidence in myself to know I can lead this team
and represent it to the best of its
After finishing fourth at
Watkins Glen, Allmendinger said, "The car
was really strong all day. We didnt have
anything for the 42 (Juan Montoya).
He was on another planet. But for the others
(runner-up Kurt Busch and third-place Marcos
Ambrose), I felt like maybe we had something for
"It was a solid day. It
was a good day in the pits. We need to build on
this. Its really cool to sign a multi-year
deal and have a great weekend."
Overall Id have ta
say the egg has gotten a bad rap.
Egg on your face, egghead,
rotten egg, etc. At least one rotten egg
doesnt ruin the barrel. The egg has ta
be onea natures most versatile foods. Fry
em, boil em, poach em,
pickle em, put em in your beer.
Folks have figured bout ever way
possible to prepare the little gems,
includin eatin em raw (not
one of my favorite topics). As a kid we used
ta put a raw egg in a milk shake and
didnt think much of it, but I prefer
eggs fully cooked at this time of life. Maybe
a soft center for dippin the toast.
Course my favorite
use of the egg is in a nice fluffy meringue.
Who married Snow White? Egg white, get the
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
Metcalf Auto Supply
CLICK and CLACK
Dear Tom and Ray:
I enjoy your column every week.
In our cars, the headlights turn off
automatically when we exit the vehicle, so
theres no danger of leaving the lights on
and draining the battery. So my wife and I just
leave the headlights on all the time when
were driving. I think if anything, this is
safer, as does she. Is there any reason not to
drive with the headlights on all the time? What
about the fog lights? Unless you have a reason
not to, well continue to doit. Thanks.
Tom: the only real downside is
that youll have to replace your headlight
bulbs more often.
Ray: But if youre willing
to pay that price for the additional visibility
you get, youre certainly not doing any
damage to the car.
Tom: It does take a little bit
of energy to power the headlights, and that
energy ultimately comes from the gasoline. So
your mileage will be reduced by a very small
degree. It might not even be measurable to you,
but it will make a small difference.
Ray: All of this applies to the
fog lights and driving lights, too. I would
caution against leaving auxiliary driving lights
on, because theyre often the equivalent of
your bright lights.
Tom: but we agree with you
--driving with your lights on is safer. The
easier you are to see, the more likely that other
drivers will see you. And if youre willing
to pay the price in bulbs and gas mileage, light
it up baby.
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