A linguistics professor was lecturing to his
class one day. "In English," he said, "A
double negative forms a positive. In some languages,
though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a
negative. However, there is no language wherein a double
positive can form a negative." A voice from the back
of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."
A tourist parked his car in downtown
Washington, D.C. He said to a man standing near the curb,
"Listen, Im going to be only a couple of
minutes. Would you watch my car while I run into this
"What?" the man huffed.
"Do you realize that I am a member of the United
"Well no," the tourist said,
"I didnt realize that. But its all
right. Ill trust you anyway."
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
On the Hood land, where the first big
mineral strike was made, there have been put down eight
drill holes from 200 to 250 feet deep and paying mineral
was found in six out of the eight drill holes. There has
been enough mineral found within a half mile of Mr.
Hoods residence to make a bigger mining camp than
Oronogo. To tell the truth, there are few Sarcoxie people
who fully realize the extent of the mineral strike that
has been made right under our noses.
The De Atley
The attorneys finished their argument
in the De Atley murder case at 5 oclock yesterday
afternoon and the case went to the jury. At 6
oclock no decision had been reached and a verdict
can not now be rendered until De Atley is taken back to
Joplin this morning to hear it. He is now in jail here.
September Sobriety Checks.
Captain Juan Villanueva,
commanding officer of Troop D, Springfield,
announces several traffic enforcement operations
that will be conducted sometime during the month
of September 2010. Along with sobriety
checkpoints in Polk, McDonald, and Jasper
counties, there will be a driving while
intoxicated saturation held in Vernon County.
Troopers assigned to the saturation will
concentrate their efforts on highways which have
been found to have a higher number of
alcohol-related crashes and enforcement contacts.
At the sobriety checkpoints, drivers will be
stopped at a static location, and upon contact
with the officers, will be asked to produce their
drivers license and proof of insurance.
Unless officers suspect drinking or other
violations, most drivers will not be asked to
exit their vehicles.
In addition, the Patrol will be
conducting hazardous moving violations projects
in Taney and Dallas counties. The primary goal of
this project is to positively impact traffic
problems by reducing crashes. The objectives are
to heighten the awareness of the risks associated
with impaired driving and increase compliance of
the speed limit and seat belt laws.
Finally, with the approaching
Labor Day weekend, troopers will be participating
in Operation C.A.R.E. (Combined Accident
Reduction Effort), as well as 10-Mile Trooper
projects along Interstate 44 throughout the
Captain Villanueva urges all
motorists to report any driver they observe
operating a vehicle in an unsafe manner. The
public can contact the Missouri State Highway
Patrol toll-free at 1-800-525-5555 or on their
cellular phone at *55.
An old sayin in the
antique business is that anything is worth
exactly what someone is willin to pay
for it. It works with antiques, the stock
market, and in puttin in streets.
Goin out for bids on
big projects for the City is time
consumin and a hassle for the bidders.
It does however, seem ta keep prices in line
and keep those pencils sharp.
What always seems strange
is how sometimes the bids are so far apart
for the same work. Most of the time there are
pretty tight bids in the mix, but ever
now and then they are all over the board.
Tryin to outguess
bidders seems ta be next ta impossible. All
you can do is play your game and hope for a
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
To Your Good
By Paul G. Donohue,
Pain Stops on Its Own
DEAR DR. DONOHUE: I am a
78-year-old, semiretired man. I am very active
and look a lot younger. I work part-time as a
truck driver delivering auto parts to garages.
Now I am out of work because of pain in my lower
back. The pain runs down to my foot. I have been
diagnosed with sciatica. My doctor sent me for an
MRI, and it showed a bulging disk. What is the
best remedy? I use ice packs, heating packs and
hot packs. I am on crutches to take pressure off
my leg. Would surgery help? -- J.S.
ANSWER: Back pain is one of the
leading problems that send people to doctors.
Most cases of back pain go away on their own,
even if theyre due to things like a bulging
(also called herniated or ruptured) disk. Even
though your back hurts, you can be as active as
your pain allows. Dont sit for prolonged
periods; sitting puts more pressure on your back
than does standing or walking. Sleep on your side
with a pillow between your knees. Continue with
heat, cold or alternating heat and cold,
whichever gives you the most pain relief. Tylenol
or a nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory medicine
(Aleve, Advil, Motrin, etc.) can make you more
If the pain doesnt let up
in six weeks, you have chronic back pain.
Sciatica is pain that travels from the back down
the leg to the foot. It comes from pressure on
the sciatic nerve. In your case, the pressure
most likely comes from your bulging back disk.
Back disks are cartilage pads placed between
adjacent backbones to absorb the shock those
bones take from our walking, bending and pushing.
The disk has a tough outer ring. Gelatinous
material makes up the inner core. If theres
a break in the outer ring, the inner core pushes
through -- a bulging, herniated or ruptured disk,
whichever term you want to use.
If sciatica doesnt
resolve on its own, a doctor can inject the back
with cortisone to reduce inflammation. That can
relieve pressure on the sciatic nerve. The
procedure is called an epidural.
Surgeons, aided by a
microscope, can remove the bulge through small
incisions, about an inch long. This technique is
called a microdiskectomy and usually is quite
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