Two philosophers were sitting at a restaurant,
discussing whether or not there was a difference between
misfortune and disaster.
"There is most certainly a
difference," said one. "If the cook suddenly
died and we couldnt have our dinner that would be a
misfortune __ but certainly not a disaster. On the other
hand, if a cruise ship carrying the Congress was to sink
in the middle of the ocean, that would be a disaster __
but by no stretch of the imagination would it be a
The lion tamer led his young apprentice
into the cage. "The first thing to remember,"
said the older man, "is that if a lion jumps at you,
throw something at it."
"And what do I do if theres
nothing to throw?"
The lion tamer said, "If a lion
jumps at you __ there will be."
A man walks into a bar with his pet
alligator. He asks the bartender, "Do you serve
lawyers here?" "Yes, we do!"
"Good. Give me a beer, and
Ill have a lawyer for my alligator."
Rose accompanied her husband Tom to his
annual checkup. While Tom was getting dressed, the doctor
came out and said to Rose, "I dont like the
way he looks." "Neither do I," she said.
"But hes handy around the house."
All generalizations are false,
including this one.
I have friends who swear they dream in
color; I say its just a pigment of their
Circular Definition: see Definition,
What has four legs and an arm? A happy
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
from New York State.
R. J. Tilton and wife of Arcade, N. Y.,
arrived this morning for a visit with Mr. and Mrs. Wm.
Perry, of whom they are relatives. Mr. Tilton has been
conducting a department store at Arcade, but he has just
sold it and he and his wife are now on their way to
California for an extended sojourn for health and
When they left New York 48 hours ago,
snow was two feet deep on the ground. Three weeks ago
there was a four foot snow, blocking trains for hours.
They find the contrast in Carthage very marked.
John Blair has been struck by the wave
of prosperity in an unusual way. He had a water meter to
repair and failing to find an available workman, Mr.
Blair went to work with a pick and shovel and did the job
Higher Level of
The City Council agenda for
this evening includes the first reading of an
Ordinance authorizing a special use pennit to
Jasper County for a Communications Tower to be
located at Jasper County Jail in the City of
Carthage, Jasper County, Missouri.
"There are several reasons
why we decided to build a new tower" states
Lt. Matt Stoller of the Jasper County
Sheriffs Department in a letter to the
Planning, Zoning and Historic Preservation
Commission, "and why we chose the height of
two hundred fifty feet. In addition to various
issues, a taller tower will allow us to reach the
Atlas facility without having to bounce signals
off of the Highway Patrol tower. It will allow us
to use a single set of wireless radios that
operate on a licensed frequency which will
eliminate the possiblility of interference from
eCarthages internet services.
"The additional height is
also necessary for us to go over the top of
Schreibers new plant.
"If allowed to finish
construction, the Jasper County Sheriffs Office
will be able to provide a higher level of
Ive got this theory
that there is only a certain amount of cold
virus in any particular area. Its about
enough to keep about half the population
sniffin and sneezin at any one
time. Thats why some folks have it and
When the haves build
up some resistance, the virus jumps to the
have-nots. After a few days, the process
Course there is no
scientific knowledge that supports this
theory, just general observation. The system
works well on many levels. For one, when the
have/have-nots are spouses, its a great
opportunity for payback, returning the same
level of compassion (or lack of) that was
shown when you were the have. If youre
one of the luck have-nots, dont burn
any bridges. Your turn is comin.
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
To Your Good Health
By Paul G. Donohue,
Trickle Down of Postnasal Drip
DEAR DR. DONOHUE: I have the
worst case of postnasal drip, and its
driving me crazy. I have a never-ending
"ahem, ahem, ahem" throat-clearing.
Phlegm is constantly in the back of my throat.
Sometimes I clear my throat a thousand times a
day. Two-thirds of my garbage is used tissues.
What can be done? -- J.B.
ANSWER: I apologize for
condensing your letter. I got the idea, and I
believe readers will too.
Three or four conditions
account for most postnasal dripping. One is
allergies. Youve seen an allergist, and the
only allergic reaction you demonstrated was to
dust mites. Can you leave your home for a week or
so -- visit a relative? If dust mites are the
cause, your symptoms should subside in a new
Vasomotor rhinitis is second on
the list of drip causes. Its a more-or-less
permanent dilation of blood vessels in the nose,
and those dilated vessels leak fluid.
Throat-clearing is part of the picture.
Sinusitis is another important
cause. An infected sinus pours out thick mucus
that drips into the back of the throat. Chronic
sinusitis is best left to the treatment of an
ear, nose and throat doctor. Nasal polyps provoke
mucus production and dripping. An ENT doctor is
equipped to deal with them, should they be found.
Medicines -- beta blockers,
Catapres for high blood pressure, aspirin and
NSAIDs -- are examples of drugs that cause the
nose to leak fluid down into the throat.
Let me provide some general
treatments that help most of these causes. You
must stop clearing your throat. Sucking on throat
lozenges or frequently sipping from a cup of hot
tea with some honey in it will clear mucus from
your throat and stop the irritation that
Flush your nose with a
saltwater solution three times a day, one of
those times being right before bedtime. You make
the solution by adding one teaspoon of salt and
half a teaspoon of baking soda to a quart of
boiled water. Add the ingredients when the water
is still hot. When the water cools, lean over a
sink and flush each nostril gently with a bulb
syringe, obtainable in drugstores.
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