| today's
laugh A judge was
interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce,
"What are the grounds for your divorce?"
She replied, "About four acres and
a nice little home in the middle of the property."
"I mean," he continued,
"What are your relations like?"
"I have an aunt and uncle living
here in town, and so do my husband’s parents."
"Please," he tried again,
"is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
"Yes, both my son and daughter
have stereo sets. We don’t necessarily like the
music, but the answer to your question is
‘yes’."
"Ma’am, does your husband
ever beat you up?"
"Yes," she responded,
"most days he gets up earlier than I do."
Finally, in frustration, the judge
asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?"
"Oh, I don’t want a
divorce," she replied. "I never wanted a
divorce. It’s husband. He says he can’t
communicate with me."
1909
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Bold Corn Thieves.
Mr. George Gibson, a prominent and
influential stockman, living ten miles up Spring river,
was in Carthage today in quest of a couple of men who
stole ten or fifteen bushels of corn from him Saturday
night.
The men were rough looking; one wore a
light mustache and would weigh probably 150 pounds; the
other was a taller man and had several weeks growth of
beard on his face. They passed Mr. Gibson’s house
going east about 5 p.m. in an old wagon, the bed
extending back into a feed box. Their horses were bay in
color, one slightly lame in the front foot.
About 8 o’clock that evening they
returned, this time with a cover on their wagon. Some
little time after they passed Mr. Gibson had occasion to
go to his feed yard, when he discovered a sack of corn
lying just outside his fence, and fresh wagon tracks
showed where the wagon stood while the men were loading
it.
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Today's Feature Carthage Resident
Arrested On Stealing Charge.
Amy L. Harrison, 46, of
Carthage, Missouri, was arrested by troopers with
the Missouri State Highway Patrol on January 25,
2010, at approximately 5:00 p.m. Harrison was
arrested for one count of felony stealing and
transported to the Jasper County Jail in
Carthage, pending formal charges. Investigation
into the theft was initiated on August 26, 2009,
by the Patrol at the request of the Carthage
Police Department. The amount of money involved
exceeded $25,000.
In August the Carthage City
Council met in an special meeting at noon. The
meeting was a regular open meeting. The sole item
was the change of signers on the Municipal Court
Bond Bank Account.
A motion was made to remove Amy
Young (now Harrison) and Captain Kevin Davis,
deceased, as signers for the account.
Police Chief Dagnan said there
were concerns over how the money was being
handled and when receipts and deposits were
compared it became obvious that money was
missing. Young was dismissed that day.
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
I haven’t confirmed
the rumor, but I’ve heard that we have a
couple of candidates for City Council already
doin’ a little campaignin’.
Actually out on the streets talkin’ with
folks in their ward. There are only a couple
a contested races, but it’s a good sign
that some are interested enough ta be out
there.
Those who haven’t
served as a member of the Council sometimes
express concerns about the various decisions
made by the group of ten. Overall, the
Council considers several viewpoints before
comin’ to a conclusion. Although
cumbersome, the system does produce valid
regulations a good portion of the time.
Fortunately, the system
isn’t perfect. That gives those who
report on the effort a chance to have a lot
more fun.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin’.
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Carthage Printing |
Weekly Columns • "Here’s how to keep pet
hair out of drains when bathing pets indoors,
which is something we have to do when the weather
is cold. We find that a wad of steel wool pushed
into the drain will catch all the hairs.
It’s easy to remove the whole thing. I place
it in a dish to drain, and when it’s dry, I
can just shake the hairs into the trash. I save
it in a zipper-top bag for just this purpose, as
it can be used over and over again." -- R.G.
in Michigan
• If you have coffee mugs
or teacups that are stained inside, rub the
insides with a little bit of dishwasher
detergent. Rinse well and dry.
• "I have saved an
old hairbrush, and I keep it by my clothes dryer.
I’m able to remove lint from the trap easily
using the brush. I also can run it over the top
of the clothes dryer to pick up stray lint that
falls off the trap as I am cleaning it. And it
helps to run a wet towel over both the clothes
washer and dryer to keep them clean. I do this as
I am washing towels." -- I.L. in Kansas
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Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.
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