| today's
        laugh A jeweller
        called the police station to report a robbery. "Youll never believe what
        happened, Sergeant. A truck backed up to my store, the
        doors opened and an elephant came out. He broke my plate
        glass window, stuck his trunk in, sucked up all the
        jewelry and climbed back into the truck. The doors closed
        and the truck pulled away." The desk sergeant said, "Could you
        tell me, for identification purposes, whether it was an
        Indian elephant or an African elephant?" "Whats the difference?"
        asked the jeweller. "Well," said the sergeant, an
        African elephant has great big ears and an Indian
        elephant has little ears." "Come to think of it, I
        couldnt see his ears," said the jeweller.
        "He had a stocking over his head." Most of us can keep a secret. Its
        the people we tell it to who cant. 1909INTERESTING MELANGE.
 A Chronological Record of Events as they have
        Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
 GRISWOLDS STORE
        ROBBED. S.B. Griswolds wholesale and
        retail grocery store on the south side of the square was
        entered by burglars Sunday night. The thieves forced an
        entrance by breaking out a glass in a rear window and
        they had a wagon at the rear of the building to carry off
        their plunder. Nothing can be missed but a small box
        containing 25 pennies which had been left lying on the
        desk. Although nothing else can be missed it
        does not follow that nothing was taken as a wagon load of
        groceries might be taken and never be missed. John Tannehill who drives a delivery
        team for Griswold first noticed the broken window this
        morning. He is confident that it was done last night as
        he was at the back of the store several times yesterday
        and he then noticed nothing amiss. 
            
                |  | Today's Feature Incident:
                Burglary The Carthage Police Department
                was advised last Thursday that the Carthage R-9
                Vocational School Building had been burglarized.
                During the investigations pertinent evidence was
                located which lead to possible suspects. At approximately 9:15 PM the
                suspects were located and brought to the police
                department for questioning. During the interviews
                a confession was obtained leading to the recovery
                of $1014.85 and a Kodak camera. Jasper County Warrants were
                obtained for Philip Jordan Benet Neese, Andrew
                Allen James Harper and Dakota Kindrick Ogden.
                They were transported to the Jasper County
                Sheriffs Department where they were turned
                over the deputy on duty. The three suspects were
                detained not being able to post bond. Ward III
                Studebaker Files. Current Council member John
                Studebaker filed as a Ward 3 candidate yesterday
                afternoon. He will face Debra Carter in the only
                contested race for City council so far. Ward 1
                and Ward 4 still have no candidate. 
 
 
 |  
                |  | Just Jake
                Talkin' Mornin',
 
                    I never have understood the
                    logic of those life time guarantees on light
                    bulbs. If ya look at the fine print on one I
                    saw, to get a new bulb, all ya have ta do is
                    send in two dollars and theyll send ya
                    a new bulb. And that for the ones that only
                    cost a buck fifty in the first place. Some warranties arent
                    quite that bad, but I had one guy tell me
                    that the $30 one year muffler and the $49
                    lifetime muffler were the same, just the
                    warrantee was better. This guy was
                    bettin on a couple a things, either ya
                    wouldnt have the car by the time the
                    muffler went out, or by chance, the muffler
                    would last for longer than expected. If as
                    many as half of the lifetime types had to be
                    replaced, he still came out o.k. and had the
                    cash up front. Course there is a chance he
                    wont be in business for your lifetime. This is some fact, but
                    mostly, Just Jake Talkin 
 |  
                | Sponsored by
                Carthage Printing | Weekly Columns HERES A TIP  By
                JoAnn Derson  Plastic shower curtains
                make a wonderful dropcloth for under a highchair.
                If your little darling is into flinging food,
                its especially helpful for cleanup.  "Did you overdo it
                on credit? Give yourself a cool-off
                period by freezing your charge cards into a block
                of ice. Now, when you want to buy something on
                credit, you will have to go home to your freezer
                to get the card and wait for it to thaw, buying
                you time to really make the right decision. It
                wont affect the card at all." -- A.L.
                in Georgia  "If you get crayon
                on wallpaper, try this trick: Hold a paper towel
                or white cloth up to the crayon and iron over it
                on the low setting. Or heat the crayon marks with
                a hair dryer, then wipe off the wax." --
                V.R. in Minnesota  Puzzles are a great
                activity for sick children, since its quiet
                and not physically taxing. To make a moveable
                workspace right on the bed, use a large piece of
                cardboard. Wrap a piece of fabric around it and
                pin or duct tape it to make it tight. The puzzle
                pieces will stay put on the fabric.  Heres a new twist
                on scrambled eggs or omelets: Make them
                rich-tasting by adding a spoonful of cream cheese
                or heavy cream to the eggs when you beat them.
                Or, make a standard omelet, but instead of
                putting shredded cheese on the inside, spread a
                tablespoon of cream cheese and fold around it.
                Add chives to the top for a garnish.  Shine up those
                patent-leather shoes with a dab of petroleum
                jelly and buff with a soft cloth. You can use
                this idea for patent-leather purses, too. |  Copyright 1997-2009 by
        Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.    
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