A tiny but dignified
old lady was among a group looking at an art exhibition
in a newly opened gallery. Suddenly one contemporary
painting caught her eye.
"What on earth," she inquired
of the artist standing nearby, "is that?"
He smiled condescendingly. "That,
my dear lady, is supposed to be a mother and her
"Well, then," snapped the
little old lady, "why isnt it?"
Liz goes to her first show at an art
gallery and is looking at the paintings. One is a huge
canvas that has black with yellow blobs of paint
splattered all over it. The next painting is a murky gray
color that has drips of purple paint streaked across it.
Liz walks over to the artist and says,
"I dont understand your paintings."
"I paint what I feel inside
me," explains the artist.
"Have you ever tried
"You guys pair up in groups of
three, then line up in a circle"
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
The Trial of James McAfee.
The trial of James McAfee, of Joplin,
charged with murder in the first degree, has been set.
McAfees attorneys are John H. Flanigan, of this
city, and M. R. Lively, of Webb City. In a talk with Mr.
Flanigan a reporter obtained some information in regard
to the case. Mr. Flanigan declined to outline the
defense, but said that McAfee claimed, and he believed
that he could prove, that he had no gun at all on the
night of the holdup, and that he was induced to go into
the alley by parties who wanted to get him killed.
"The state," said Mr. Flanigan, "does not
provide one cent for the expenses of attorneys in such a
case and McAfee has not a dollar. So I have simply got
out subpoenas for about fifty of them and it will cost
the state $3 a head to bring them here for the trial. If
McAfee had money to pay attorneys traveling
expenses there is no question but that he would be
Govoner Signs Automotive
Manufacturing Jobs Act .
Gov. Jay Nixon has signed a
bill passed during the special legislative
session on Wednesday (July 14) that will support
Missouris automotive industry and jobs. The
Governor was joined by auto workers as he signed
House Bill 2, the Missouri Automotive
Manufacturing Jobs Act, at a UAW Local located
near the Ford Motor Co. plant in Claycomo, which
employs about 3,700 workers.
The Missouri Automotive
Manufacturing Jobs will allow qualified
manufacturing facilities or suppliers that bring
next-generation production lines to Missouri to
retain withholding taxes typically remitted to
the state. To be eligible for these incentives,
manufacturers would be required to make a
substantial capital investment in production
capacity and put people back to work. Incentives
would be triggered only after a company had made
a firm commitment for that investment and workers
were on the job. Strict requirements would force
a company to repay the incentives if that
commitment were not upheld. The total amount of
incentives under the act is capped at $15 million
I guess if folks understand
what youre talkin about, it
doesnt really matter that what your
sayin doesnt actually make any
Ive always thought
the term cat fishin was a little
misleadin. Course the same is
true for ice fishin, and pond
fishin I suppose.
Then there are those
expressions like sky high and low down. I
guess just one word isnt sufficient to
express the extreme of high or low.
Its probly not
reasonable to assume that we humans would
always say exactly what we are thinkin
or really mean, specially
considerin how much most of us talk. We
all take short cuts like "cat
fishin" when we know theyll
be understood. Sides, if ya have to
explain it, youre probly in the
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
THIS IS A HAMMER
By Samantha Mazzotta
Dont Put Off
Q: While cleaning out the
gutters a few weeks ago, I noticed a couple of
shingles on the roof that have been torn
slightly, one with a chunk missing from the
corner and the other looks loose or pried up.
Whats the best way to fix them? Should I
look for underlying damage? -- Earl C., Omaha,
A: Small tears in asphalt
shingles can be patched up pretty quickly using
roofing cement. Brush any debris out of the torn
or bent area and apply a good amount of cement,
then tack down.
A shingle with a torn-off
corner can be patched by cutting a similar-sized
piece from a spare shingle and applying roofing
cement both to the underside and along the tear.
However, this wont last very long, so the
entire shingle should be replaced within a few
months -- or you can replace it right away.
Note: Always secure yourself
with a rope or harness, and never work without a
To replace shingles,
youll need -- in addition to new shingles
-- a flat pry bar, a hammer, roofing cement,
7/8-inch or 1-inch roofing nails, and a utility
Carefully slide out damaged
shingles, beginning with the topmost shingle.
Pull out old nails in the repair area, then
inspect the exposed building paper for damage.
Patch small tears with roofing cement.
Working from the bottom of the
repair area upward, install the new shingles.
These should overlap and stagger the row of
shingles below. Nail in roofing nails at the tab
The uppermost shingle
wont initially be nailed in, since you need
to slip it underneath existing shingles. Instead,
flip it over, apply roofing cement to the
underside (the part that will slip underneath the
shingles above) and gently slide into place. Give
the cement a minute to set, then have your helper
gently lift the edges of the shingles above while
you nail in roofing nails.
While youre up there,
its a good time to inspect the rest of the
roof and make spot repairs, using roofing cement,
to common trouble spots like the flashing around
the chimney or roof joints.
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