A couple had two little
boys, ages 8 and 10, who were excessively mischievous.
The boys mother heard that a
clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining
children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys.
The clergyman agreed, but asked to see them individually.
The clergyman, a huge man with a
booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him
sternly, "Where is God?" The boys mouth
dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there with
his mouth hanging open, wide eyed. So the clergyman
repeated the question in an even sterner tone,
"Where is God!!?"
Again the boy made no attempt to
answer. So the clergyman raised his voice even more and
shook his finger in the boys face and bellowed,
"WHERE IS GOD!?"
The boy screamed and bolted from the
room, ran directly home and dove into his closet,
slamming the door behind him.
When his older brother found him in the
closet, he asked, "What happened?"
The younger brother replied,"We
are in BIG trouble this time, dude. God is missing - and
they think WE did it.!"
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
A Hole Made in the Wall Through Which
This mornings Joplin Globe says:
"Last night about 11 oclock the prisoners in
the Joplin jail crawled out through a hole that two of
them made in the rear of the jail near the door. Four of
them went in search of the officers as soon as they got
out to notify them of what had happened. When they found
the officers they were told to go and crawl into jail
again by the same route they got out. They did so and the
police looked for Jim Marrs and Patsey Hogan, the men who
had dug the hole through the wall. They were not found.
Their getting away is no great loss,
but it is a sad commentary on the jail walls that
prisoners can go through them so readily. A nozzle from a
garden hose, used in scrubbing the jail, was the
instrument employed in digging through the walls.
Candy at Carthage Maple Leaf Parade.
The Maple Leaf Festival
committee met on Tuesday, June 21st and
unanimously voted to ban candy distribution from
the 2010 Maple Leaf Parade. The primary concern
announced by the committee is safety of children
and the public. For years, volunteers have noted
that event excitement and natural competition to
capture the candy often results in children
running out in front of parade traffic. Many
volunteers as well as police officers can cite
near misses of children being injured by parade
entries. Co-chair for the Maple Leaf Festival
Committee, Cheryle Finley states, "We have
been very specific for many years on our parade
entry forms that candy should not be thrown from
cars or floats and yet we have continued to have
problems with non-compliance. We have tried to
encourage those passing out candy to walk along
the spectator line and hand it out but,
unfortunately, when done correctly, this method
is time consuming and cause lapses in the
Additionally, the committee
indicated a variety of other reasons candy
distribution has been a troublesome issue in the
an understanding that
the person who fills out the entry form is not
always one of the parade participants and this
has caused the parade rules to be lost in
drivers of some of the
big vehicles cant see the little ones that
might get close to the wheels,
contribute to additional litter on the Historic
there is no way to
monitor those throwing or distributing candy;
anyone could dress up, step in line along the
parade route and distribute tainted candy.
The committee referred to
several community parades that have had no candy
policies and indicated that Carthage can have a
great parade without candy.
Theres probly lots a
things I never mastered as well as my dad,
but I know I could never get the hang of
spinnin a four-way lug wrench while
changin a tire. Course I suppose
that could mean that I never got the practice
changin tires that he did.
One a the problems with
changin a flat on the newer cars is
they dont have a decent hubcap ta throw
the lug nuts in. Youve probly
seen the guy bent down by the car, with one a
those little flimsy L shaped tire tools in
one hand and a lug nut in the other,
lookin completely bewildered. Hes
lookin for a spot to lay the nut so he
wont loose it.
Those little critters will
start rollin until they find the exact
center of the car. The real embarrassment
comes when ya gotta limp inta town with that
little weenie tire. Theres just no joy
in changin a flat anymore.
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
What Is Prickly Heat?
DEAR DR. DONOHUE: Exactly what
is prickly heat? Do adults get it? If they do, I
think I have it. -- M.K.
ANSWER: Adults do get prickly
heat. It looks like red dots or tiny blisters on
the skin. The rash itches or feels
"prickly." Sweat ducts have become
Prevention comes with dressing
as coolly as possible in light cotton clothes.
Air-conditioning is the ultimate answer. Second
best is having a fan blowing on you. If you have
a breakout, cool-water compresses take away the
itch or prickliness, as do cortisone creams,
which are found in all drugstores.
DEAR DR. DONOHUE: My husband
has some kind of sleep disorder. He doesnt
believe he has a problem. I know about restless
leg syndrome, but he has something beyond that.
About four nights a week, his legs kick all over,
and he throws his body in every direction. The
bed bounces like a trampoline. In one month, he
made large holes in two quality flannel sheets.
Several times, he has hit me across the face.
What is this problem? -- M.L.
ANSWER: You describe periodic
limb movements of sleep, PLMS, which used to be
called nocturnal myoclonus. Most of the time,
only the legs are involved. The toes, ankles,
knees and hips involuntarily bend and straighten
during sleep. The movements happen every 20 to 40
seconds, and each episode lasts from a few
minutes to hours.
Restless leg syndrome is a
crawling sensation beneath the skin of the legs.
The person has to get up and walk around to put
an end to the annoying sensations. Sometimes it
is associated with iron deficiency, and sometimes
restless leg patients also experience periodic
limb movements. Pramipexole or ropinirole treat
both conditions. Your husband should see a
Copyright 1997-2010 by
Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.