Teacher: Billy, give me a sentence starting with
Billy: I is ...
Teacher: No, Billy. Always say, "I
Billy: All right ... "I am the
ninth letter of the alphabet."
"I have good news and bad
news," a defence attorney told his client.
"First the bad news. The blood test came back, and
your DNA is an exact match with that found at the crime
"Oh, no!" cried the client.
"Whats the good news?"
"Your cholesterol is down to
The doctor took his patient into the
room and said, "I have some good news and some bad
The patient said, "Give me the
"Theyre going to name a
disease after you."
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Going West To Locate.
A number of people took avantage of the
cheap rates to the far west yesterday and left on a
Chas. Corwin and son left for Seattle,
Washington. He expects that he will probably locate
there; and if he does will later send for his family. He
was accompanied by Morris and Felix Spencer of
Fayetteville, Ark., who formerly lived here and whose
father was formerly Mr. Corwins partner in business
here. They go to join a brother who is a doctor at
H. M. Hill and wife and two children
left for Kendrick, Idaho, where they will reside. Mr.
Hill has been employed here as an electric lineman.
Mrs. Calkins, who resided at the south
end of Garrison avenue, started for Ashland, Oregon, to
join her husband there.
One of Ed Prices sons left for
Koster says Hancock Amendment protects taxpayers
from unfair increased user fees.
Jefferson City, Mo.
Attorney General Chris Koster said today that the
Hancock Amendment does not allow cities to tack
taxes onto "user fees" to avoid the
Hancock Amendments requirement of a public
Koster said his office filed a
brief with that opinion on behalf of the offices
of the Attorney General and the State Auditor.
State Auditor Susan Montee has released a number
of audit reports that identified cities that she
found collected excess utility charges that were
then transferred to the general revenue of the
cities for other uses.
"The Hancock Amendment is
clear that cities cannot avoid a vote to raise
taxes for other city services simply by
increasing the user fees for services such as
city utilities," Koster said. "I
commend Auditor Montee for identifying this
unfair avoidance of the Hancock Amendment. The
law says Missouri taxpayers have the right to say
when they want their taxes increased and
increasing user fees for that purpose clearly is
in breach of the law.
Got into a situation once.
I ended up boardin a horse that was
bein fought over by a couple
gettin a divorce. Got a little attached
to the animal over six or eight months.
Offered to buy the horse, but no deal.
When the eventual owner
came to pick up the spirited quarter horse, I
knew gettin loaded in a trailer would
be a problem. I figured that after
tanglin with the horse for an hour or
so the owner might reconsider my offer. I sat
on the porch and watched the animal get
pushed and shoved, nearly choked with a rope.
I finally gave in and went down and calmed
the animal and got it in the trailer. I could
only hope the owner was payin
There are some situations
where ya just dont have much choice.
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
Carthage Printing Services
Comparing Traditional Light Bulbs to
Q: What is the difference
between a regular light bulb and one of those new
energy-saving bulbs? If I want to replace a
75-watt regular bulb with a new type, is the
wattage the same? -- Gladys in Philadelphia
A: Compact fluorescent light
bulbs (CFLs) are considered the new standard for
energy-efficient lighting, as they reportedly use
75 percent less energy than standard incandescent
bulbs to produce the same amount of light. They
last up to 10 times longer as well. Its
estimated that a CFL bulb can save more than $40
in electricity costs over its lifetime. And if
you live in a hot climate, CFLs produce about 75
percent less heat, so they can cut energy costs
associated with air conditioning.
One of the first things
youll notice on a CFL bulb is that the
wattage is much lower. So, how do you compare the
brightness to your standard light bulb? If
youre replacing a 75-watt incandescent
bulb, youll want to select an 18-to-25 watt
CFL. Most CFL bulb boxes have the equivalent
wattage printed on them. Dimmers, three-way
lights and other specialty CFLs also are
Another consideration is the
color of light produced by a CFL. If you want the
warm glow of your old incandescent bulbs, choose
warm white or soft white. For kitchens, cool
white or bright white is a good choice. For
reading, choose natural or daylight.
CFLs, like other bulbs, do burn
out and can break if dropped or mishandled. So be
sure to screw the bulb in by its base, not by
holding the bulb. CFLs contain a very small
amount of mercury, so if a bulb breaks, be
careful not to handle it during cleanup. When a
CFL bulb burns out, dispose of it according to
your city or towns fluorescent-light
The Energy Star website
(www.energystar.gov) offers a fairly complete
guide to CFLs and tips on buying them.
HOME TIP: Be wary of CFL bulbs
that sell for significantly less than other CFLs.
Look for the Energy Star label, which certifies
the bulbs as meeting energy efficiency standards.
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Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.