The Mornin' Mail is published every weekday except major holidays
Thursday, August 25, 2011 Volume XX, Number 48

did ya know?.

Did Ya Know?.. Stone’s Throw Theatre, 796 S. Stone Lane, will hold auditions for "Lost in Yonkers", on Sun., Aug 28, and Mon., Aug 29 at the theatre, 6:00 pm both nights. .Cold readings. Parts are 4 male (2 younger teens); 3 female roles. 358-9665

Did Ya Know?.. Singles Reaching Out - West meet on Friday Aug. 26 at 6 pm at Lucky J Steakhouse. Join us for dinner. Call 417-246-5604 or 417-388-3038 for info

today's laugh

A rich women goes to the police station and asks the police officer to write a complaint about her missing dog. He say "you should give a brief description about your dog".

She says one of his ears is missing, one of his eyes is missing, one of his legs his missing and his tail is half cut off. He asks for the dogs name.

She replies "lucky".


"President is in Southeast Asia... and because of the metric system over there, his approval rating is actually 62."

--David Letterman


A young boy was looking through the family album and asked his mother: "Who’s this guy on the beach with you with all the muscles and curly hair?"

"That’s your father."

"Then who’s that old bald-headed fat man who lives with us now?"


A Chronological Record of Events as they have Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.

County Court


H P Haizlip, special road work Mineral township, $45.

Joplin Telephone Co., two phones one year, $48.

J C Young, repairing roof at jail, $14

W A Robbins, supplies for pauper, $8.00.

Inquest costs in the case of -- Moore, $23.45.

C N Clark, services as road and bridge commissioner, $82.

W H Warren, services at sheriff, $45.

W A Turner, services as county agent 6 months, $50.

L W Winter, taking insane patient to Nevada, $14.75.

C E Elliott, two days as county judge, $10.

J Roessler, shoes, $1.25

  Today's Feature

Grand Old Christmas.

The Carthage CVB is forming a committee to re-organize the Grand Old Christmas Tradition. The first meeting will be Tuesday, August 30, 2011 at 8:00 a.m. at in the Carthage Chamber of Commerce Board room. As a committee of the CVB, any community member may assist, sponsor or join the committee; participants need not be chamber members. "Ideal members for the committee would be retailers, faith-based organizations, holiday event planners and any person interested in the Celebrating the Holiday Season in Carthage," says Wendi Douglas Executive Director, CVB.

Items on the agenda the first agenda include: 2011 Calendar of Events, Sponsorship Opportunities, Committee Assignments, Christmas 2012

"We feel this is a strong idea to bring tourists, shoppers and holiday cheer to the City of Carthage;" said Douglass, "however, we are struggling to find the time and talent to move forward. Your attendance or a response could be vital in a decision process. I encourage you to forward the invitation to someone you feel may be excited about the project."

Jasper County Jail Count

182August 24, 2011

Total Including Placed out of County


By Monte Dutton

Truex Works Through a Season of Bad Luck

It’s tempting to think that Martin Truex Jr. has clouds hanging over him similar to the ones that enshrouded Watkins Glen International.

Only it’s been overcast in Truex’s career for a good bit of the time since June 4, 2007, when he won a NASCAR Sprint Cup race at Dover (Del.) International Speedway. He finished 11th in the point standings that year. Through 2009, Truex competed for Dale Earnhardt Inc. He now drives the No. 56 NAPA Toyota for Michael Waltrip Racing.

In the past three years, Truex has finished 15th, 23rd and 22nd, respectively, in the standings. Entering the Heluva Good! Sour Cream Dips at the Glen, he ranked 22nd.

"Bad luck is a tough thing," Truex said. "I’ve had my share of it the past few years.

"People say you make your own luck, and you do, somewhat. But there are times when there is nothing you can do about it."

Truex, 31, doesn’t have much to show for the current season. He finished sixth at Las Vegas Motor Speedway in the season’s third race. Since then he has collected eighth-place finishes at Dover, Infineon (Sonoma, Calif.) and Loudon, N.H.

"Luck plays a big part in what we do," said the Mayetta, N.J., native. "It takes a million things to go right to win of these races. It only takes one to go wrong ... a flat tire, the caution coming at the wrong time, a debris caution after you pit under green ... things like that.

"There are some things where it doesn’t matter what you do, you can’t change them -- and that’s luck. And it’s tough to deal with, especially when you’ve had a good day and your team’s done everything right."

At this point, making the Chase is outside the realm of practical consideration.

"You have to just forget about last week, move forward, try to do the best you can with what you have and you know when your team is doing good and when they’re not," said Truex. "You just have to forget about all those bad things and push forward and work on the things you can control."

Just Jake Talkin'

With all the advances in communication devices that have been made in the last several years, I am amazed that it is still nearly impossible to understand the person takin’ an order at a fast food drive-up. Sometimes I think they put in some sort of voice scramblin’ device so as to make ya accept what ever they have on hand at the time.

I also have a particular pet peeve with drive-up speaker orderin’. Ya turn in your order, but when ya get to the window, after you’ve paid of course, you’re notified that they just ran out of that one thing ya stopped there for in the first place. It just ruins that high quality dinin’ experience that we’ve all come to expect from fast food restaurants.

And no, I don’t want whatever the special of the minute is, thank you. I couldn’t understand what it was anyway.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’.

Sponsored by Metcalf Auto Supply

Weekly Column



I live in a gated community with lots of speed bumps to deter speeding. I am always amazed at the ingenious techniques people use when they go over speed bumps. There is the one-wheel technique, the diagonal technique and, of course, the old-man (3 mph) technique. I prefer the straight-on-at-20-mph technique. Which way is best for your car? -- Frank

TOM: Well, the straight-on-at-20-mph technique is best for US, Frank. We sell a lot of suspension parts that way.

RAY: But what’s best for the car? No question about it: The old-man (3 mph) technique. In fact, we’re going to rename that approach the "genius technique."

TOM: When you hit bumps hard, like you do, Frank, you jolt every part of the suspension system. It’s like whacking every part in the car with a hammer. And even though cars are built to take a certain amount of punishment, the more they take and the harder they take it, the sooner their parts wear out.

RAY: And what happens to older cars that have taken more than their share of hard knocks like that? They tend to squeak and rattle and chatter their way down the road, dropping occasional parts along the way (see also: any of my brother’s heaps).

TOM: Whereas using the "genius technique" and going over a bump like that at 3 mph does practically no damage. The springs and shocks compress gently and absorb the bump, and then they decompress.

TOM: And besides, when you go 20 mph over speed bumps, you’re defeating their whole purpose -- to stop knuckleheads from driving too fast in a pedestrian-heavy area. They’re slowing you down for a reason -- so that kids and older folks and everyone else who walks or crosses the street is safer.

Copyright 2011, Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.