The Mornin' Mail is published every weekday except major holidays
Monday, February 21, 2011 Volume XIX, Number 167

did ya know?.

Did Ya Know?...Singles Reaching Out (West will have a Pot Luck & game night Fri., Feb 25 at 6:30 p.m. in the Ulmers Community Room. Everyone invited - . For info call Belinda - 359-9986

today's laugh

A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns to tell their adventures on the seas. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, hook, and an eye patch. Curious, the seaman asks "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?"

The pirate replies "I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off".

"Wow!" said the seaman. "What about the hook"?

"Well...", replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand clean off."

"Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch"?

"A seagull dropping fell into my eye", replied the pirate.

"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?" the sailor asked.

"Well..." said the pirate, "That was my first day with the hook."


A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three very large, leathered bikers walked in. The first walked up to the old man, pushed his cigarette into the old man’s pie and then took a seat at the counter. The second walked up to the old man, spat into the old man’s milk and then he too took a seat at the counter. The third walked up to the old man, turned over the old man’s plate, and then he took a seat at the counter.

Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner. Shortly thereafter, one of the bikers said to the waitress, "Humph, not much of a man, was he?"

The waitress replied, "Not much of a truck driver either, he just backed his big-rig over three motorcycles."


"I wish I knew where I was going to die," Paul says.

"Why?" asks Tom

"Because if I knew I would not go there "Paul replied.


A Chronological Record of Events as they have Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.


The first dire results of the big flood were felt last night about 9 o’clock, when the electric light plant was compelled to shut down, and the city streets and business houses, hotels and halls were in darkness during the blackest night.

Paradoxical as it may seem, too much water on the outside made it impossible for the light plant boilers to get enough water inside. The flood washed a bank of mud and debris up over the check valves where the boilers take water from the pond, and choked it completely up. Then the plant had to quit business.

Supt. Ford worked till midnight and today had a force of eleven men all day long at work undoing the mischief. The pipes are still flooded and it is necessary to work under a foot or two of water. This makes progress slow, but Supt. Ford hopes to be able to fire up his boilers by dusk this evening.

  Today's Feature

From the Minutes:

Public Works Committee.


"Public Works Director Carney reported on the February 1st and February 8th snow storms. The Street Department had 122 3/4 man hours of overtime. Approximately (40) tons of salt and (38) truckloads of cinders were used. The 2002 Chevrolet dump truck sustained damage to the frame due to the snow plow hitting a box culvert on Forest Street, just south of Macon. Various curb and gutters were damaged while snow plowing. Mr. Carney stated that considering the large amount of snow and the equipment break downs, everyone worked very hard together to get all the streets plowed.

"Mr. Carney thanked the Fire Department for providing hot meals to City employees during the snow storms.

"Mr. Carney also extended his appreciation to Tim Coburn with Jackson Tire, Metcalf Auto Supply and Pipe Systems inc., for assisting the Street Department with repairs on such short notice."

Just Jake Talkin'

I was sortin’ through over the weekend and happened to find the four or five Ted Williams baseball cards that remain from my childhood collection.

At one time I had close to all of the Williams cards. That is until a former relative saw that ad offerin’ to buy baseball cards. I got home from work one day and was gleefully presented with a ten dollar bill. I was supposed ta be happy that the guy paid a nickel a card for my collection.

I hadn’t thought of that situation for several years. I don’t know how these remainin’ cards escaped the sell-off, but I almost wish they had gone the way of the rest. They now just act as a reminder.

No, they ain’t for sale for a nickel. They prob’ly aren’t worth a lot, but they do have some pleasant memories attached.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’.

Sponsored by Carthage Printing

Weekly Columns


By Samantha Mazzotta

Safety From Gas Leaks

DEAR HAMMER: I wanted to relate a story that your readers might find helpful. Last month, in the middle of the night, I woke up to the very strong smell of gas throughout my house. I immediately got everyone up and told them to get out of the house. All the burner controls on my kitchen stove appeared to be in the off position. I didn’t try to turn off the gas at the meter because it is located in my basement and the gas odor was so strong I was worried about an explosion.

Instead, my family and I went to the neighbor’s house across the street, woke them up and called the fire department from there. They got there quickly and shut off the gas supply. The culprit was a faulty joint in a gas supply pipe just past the meter, which was quickly repaired the next day by a specialist who also checked out the entire system.

Please tell your readers to have an emergency plan ready in case they have to quickly evacuate the house, and make sure your kids, even the youngest ones, know it. I’m really proud of my wife and kids, who got up with hardly any questions and got out of the house with just their pajamas and slippers on during a cold night. But I’m still going over the incident in my head to think of ways to get out safely, or even better, to prevent this situation from happening again. Hopefully my experience can help others. -- James G., Amherst, Mass.

DEAR JAMES: Thanks so much for relating your experience! I’m glad everyone was OK. This is a way of sounding a wake-up call to readers who haven’t thought much lately about home safety. An evacuation plan is a must, as is regularly checking carbon monoxide and smoke detectors to make sure they’re working properly, keeping fire extinguishers within easy reach near areas of open flame (like the stove or fireplace) and educating your kids about safety in and around the home.

HOME TIP: Know the location of your home’s gas meter, the main water-shutoff valve and the electrical circuit box so they can be quickly accessed by you or emergency personnel.

Copyright 2011, Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.