Stone’s Throw FUNDRAISER.

Unusually clean yet bitingly clever, Marian Kelly has delighted every kind of audience, including comedy clubs, conventions, corporate events, churches, colleges and civic organizations.

Marian will perform her hilarious comedy show to help Stone’s Throw Dinner Theatre raise funds to continue their recent upgrades and renovations of the theatre. Those attending will enjoy the new paint, carpets, lighting and sound system in the dining room.

Marian has appeared on numerous television programs, including The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, A&E’s Night at the Improv., and Star Search. She has performed in 40 states, including Alaska and Hawaii, and has shared the stage with Ed McMahon, Tim Allen, Jeff Foxworthy, Kevin Pollack, and Henry Winkler.

This special fundraiser performance will be held at Stone’s Throw Dinner Theatre, 796 South Stone Lane, Carthage, MO on Saturday, April 16, 2011.

Admission is $20.00 for General Seating. Doors will open at 6:30 pm.

A pre-show magic performance by Luke Mouton will begin at 7:30pm.

I’m still amazed that you can buy bread with no crust at the grocery.

‘Course I’ve known kids that wouldn’t eat bread with the crust on it. But even more amazin’ is the fact that I’ve seen mothers cut the crust off the bread so the kid wouldn’t have too. Then there was the fit my brother threw (once) ‘cause Mom wouldn’t make him a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with the peanut butter on top.

What I want is a loaf of nothin’ but the heals. If they took all the heals outa those loafs without any crust, it looks like there would be plenty of heals ta go around.

They could prob’ly take the heals outa all loafs a bread and not cause much of a stir. ‘Cept for those who like heals, and they could buy the heal loafs. ‘Course when mixin’ heals and non-heals, the heal always goes on top.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’.

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Weekly Columns

THIS IS A HAMMER

By Samantha Mazzotta

Picking the Right Plumber

Q: I need some repairs to pipes under my house that have small leaks, plus some other minor fixes around the house such as dripping taps. But I’m nervous about getting charged too much. How can I find a reputable plumber? -- May H., Knoxville, Tenn.

A: There are a number of things you can and should do when hiring a plumber for the first time. Following these steps will increase your chances of finding a plumber who will do the job right and at competitive rates.

--Ask a friend or relative: If they’ve hired a plumber who did a good job, they’ll be glad to recommend him or her to you.

--Contact two or more plumbers: Compare the rate each will charge for the work, learn exactly what repairs they will make, and how long they’ll take to complete the job. (For small jobs, some plumbers will give rates over the phone, but make sure they then put their estimates in writing before agreeing to the work.)

--Always ask for the plumber’s license: Reputable trade professionals are licensed by the state, and you can check the license number with the state’s professional licensing division, by phone or on the Internet.

--Don’t be afraid to ask questions: Find out how long the plumber has been in business, how big or small the company is, get details about the job and who exactly will perform the work, and so on. It’s your house and your money, and you have the right to ask and the right to refuse to hire someone for the job if you aren’t comfortable.

--Don’t make the decision alone: If you’re having trouble deciding which plumber to use, have a trusted friend or relative by your side when each plumber arrives and when comparing estimates.

Finally, check the local Better Business Bureau to see if any complaints were registered against any of the plumbers you are considering.