At a nursing home in Florida, a group of senior
citizens were sitting around talking about their aches
"My arms are so weak I can hardly
lift this cup of coffee," said one.
"I know what you mean. My
cataracts are so bad I cant even see my
coffee," replied another.
"I cant turn my head because
of the arthritis in my neck," said a third.
"My blood pressure pills make me
dizzy," another contributed.
"I guess thats the price we
pay for getting old," winced an old man. Then there
was a short moment of silence.
"Thank God we can all still
drive," said one woman cheerfully.
Its a nasty day, and a guy gets
pulled over for speeding.
The cop says, "Isnt it kind
of dumb to be driving so fast in this storm?"
The driver says, "Whos dumb?
Youre the one whos standing out in the
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
TESTING THE WATER
H.R. Loudon and D.J. Matteson of St.
Louis, adjusters for the leading fire insurance companies
of the state, were in the city today, testing the
pressure of the city water plant, the condition of the
fire plugs, fire department pump house and other fire
A test of the water pressure was made
by the fire department at 4 oclock this afternoon
on the northeast corner of the square. Three streams were
turned on at once and averaged a horizontal throw of 125
feet, while one stream alone threw 150 feet.
The requirement of the water works are
a perpendicular throw of 90 feet by five 1 1/4 inch
nozzles at once.The test was considered fairly
satisfactory. Quite a crowd was attracted by the firemen
playing the hose about the north and east sides of the
Maple Leaf Circus
Tickets Are Now Available.
The 45th annual Maple Leaf
Festival is excited to announce the addition of
the Kelly Miller Circus to this years
The circus will roll into town
Sunday, October 16, 2011. Everyone is invited to
come out and watch the animals being unloaded and
fed, and the elephants raising the big top.
Activities begin at 7:30 am and the tent will be
raised at 9:00 am. Guides will be furnished for
school groups and anyone attending. The
traditional old style circus will present two
performances at 2:00 and 5:00 pm.
Tickets can be purchased at
sponsor locations, Carthage Chamber of Commerce,
Farmers Insurance-Marian Cook Agency, All
Things Grand-Carthage and Joplin locations,
Arvest Bank-Carthage locations, Cornerstone
Family Dental, Lucky J Restaurant and Arena and
The 2011 season has many new
acts and entertainers, elephants, tigers, horses
and a cast of international circus stars under a
beautiful circus big top.
County Jail Count
183 September 9,
Including Placed out of County
Most folks have a problem
understandin that they dont own
their sidewalk, but they are responsible for
taken care of it. Kinda like a stray cat that
shows up for dinner ever night. There has
been some discussion over that fact for quite
a few years as can be observed in the various
and sundry condition of the sidewalks in the
City. The other ordinance that is sometimes
referred to is one requirin sidewalks
for all residential areas. I havent
personally looked that one up, but there
seems ta be some concern that one hasnt
been enforced either.
This is not a quick fix
type a problem for sure. Other cities have
put together programs where there was some
type of program worked out so land owners
could either pay for improvements over a
length of time or some other shared payment
type setup. Surely we can find some solution.
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
THIS IS A HAMMER
By Samantha Mazzotta
Antics Drive Wife Mad
Q: The toilet in our master
bedroom, for no reason I can explain, will
randomly start running for a few minutes and then
stop again. Of course, it is accompanied each
time by a faint hissing sound as the water flows
into the tank and then a "clunk" when
it stops. At night, this is incredibly annoying.
My wife wants it fixed ASAP. Is this something
that can be fixed quickly, or do I need to call a
plumber? -- Hoyt C., Vero Beach, Fla.
A: Theres a good chance
you can fix this yourself. Whats happening
is that water is silently trickling from the
upper tank into the toilet bowl. When the water
level of the tank drops to a certain point (below
the range of the float ball or indicator), the
inlet valve at the bottom of the tank opens up
and the tank refills. Once the water level rises
and returns the float ball or indicator to its
top position, the valve closes and the water
stops. Often youll hear a "clunk"
or chain rattle as this happens.
To verify a slow leak, mark the
water level at its highest point (right after it
finishes refilling from a flush) with a crayon,
then close the inlet valve under the tank. Come
back in a half hour to an hour to see if the
water level has fallen.
Next, try to locate the cause
of the leak. If theres no water on the
floor (indicating bad seals or a cracked tank --
a definite contact-the-plumber sign) then the
flapper valve -- the big valve in the center of
the tank that dumps water into the bowl with each
flush -- is the likely culprit.
The problem could be as simple
as a misaligned flapper valve. This is most
commonly caused by a lift chain or lift arm that
is too long or too short. (The lift chain or arm
literally lifts the flapper valve up when you
push the flush handle -- try it now and see.)
Adjust the chain by placing the connecting hook
(the hook that attaches the chain to the upper
lift arm) into a different rung of the chain.
Adjust a vertical lift arm by either slightly
bending or straightening the arm.
If the adjustment doesnt
work, consider the age of the flush assembly. The
seals may be breaking down, especially in a
hard-water environment. Replacement assemblies
can be purchased at your local home-improvement
store (be sure to bring the toilets brand
and model number with you to get the correct
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