| today's
laugh There was this doctor who was severely
overworked, which bothered him a lot as he wasn’t
able to care for his patients as he would have wished.
So, using his professional knowledge, he cloned himself.
For a while, this arrangement worked
really well. The patients couldn’t tell which was
the original doctor and which was the clone, and everyone
received a much better level of care. But then things
started to go wrong. The clone doctor began to make lewd
and suggestive comments to female patients and even came
close to a serious sexual assault.
The doctor decided that before things
went from bad to worse he had to get rid of the clone. So
he lured him up to the top of a tall building and pushed
him off, killing him. He thought his problem was solved,
but the following day the police arrested him for making
an obscene clone fall.
What kind of little girl
was your Mom?
" I don’t know because I
wasn’t there, but my guess would be pretty
bossy."
1911
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
SARCOXIE’S BERRY
CROP!
Not More than 100 Cars this
Year-General Conditions.
"The berry season is practically
at an end," says Sarcoxie Tribune. "Up to and
including Wednesday evening, the Horticultural
association had shipped 82 cars and Gandy people 5, and
with about 3 cars today makes a total of 90 cars of
berries shipped in car lots. A few straggling car loads
will continue to go out probably up to next Monday, but
it is not likely that 100 cars will be shipped.
"Taking the season through, prices
have undoubtedly ruled higher than last year, and many of
the growers will doubtless make more money than last
year, but for pickers and those engaged in other lines of
business, the season has not proven so profitable.
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Today's Feature Art During the
Maple Leaf Festival
The Carthage Convention &
Visitor’s Bureau and UMB Bank will host the
Maple Leaf Art Walk on the Historic Carthage
Square. They are gearing up for their October
Event. The event will be Friday Oct 14th
6:00-8:30 p.m. and Saturday October 15th 10:00
a.m.-3:00 p.m., with a special "After
Hours" at Koka Gallery Friday from
8:30-10:00 p.m.
Those who visit the Carthage
Art Walk on Facebook by Friday, September 16th at
12:00 noon and share Carthage Art Walk with their
friends and obtain 200 "likes", will
qualify for a drawing for an Art Walk prize pack
including prints from Lowell Davis, a cookbook
and postcards of Historic Carthage!
New to this year’s Maple
Leaf Festival, it give the opportunity to
celebrate art on the Carthage Square, a prime
backdrop with several established galleries
located around the square along with dining
options and live music.
For more information, contact
Wendi Douglas at the Carthage Convention and
Visitor’s Bureau, 417-359-8181 or
wdouglas@ecarthage.com."
Jasper
County Jail Count
193 September
13, 2011
Total
Including Placed out of County
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
There is prob’ly not a
more accurate classic quotation that the one
from "Cool Hand Luke." Most will
know what it is without bein’ told, but
for those youngsters that happen ta be
readin’ it is "What we have here is
a failure to communicate."
Nothin’ causes more
problems, litigation, divorces, and just down
right cantankerous attitudes than a failure
to understand what’s really goin’
on.
Now the character in the
movie didn’t mean that ever’one was
gonna sit down and discuss what was
botherin’. What he was sayin’ was
folks just weren’t payin’ attention
to what he was sayin’. I’ve heard
its always a good idea ta have the person
you’re talkin’ to repeat what
you’ve said just ta make sure they
understand. ‘Course as they say,
there’s always time ta fix what there
wasn’t time ta do right the first time.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin’.
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| Sponsored by
Carthage Printing |
Weekly
Column
HERE’S A TIP
By
JoAnn Derson
• "I love to have
sauteed, sliced mushrooms, and I use my egg
slicer to get perfect slices. It’s very
handy and much easier to use than doing it with a
knife." -- K.P. in Arizona
• To make your own
ammonia-based pretreatment for laundry stains,
mix together equal parts water, liquid detergent
and ammonia in a spray bottle. Never use with
bleach.
• You can use a soft cloth
dampened with vinegar to clean greasy stains off
of suede shoes. This also works on patent
leather.
• To shorten
children’s shoelaces, tie to appropriate
length, then cut off excess. Dip the ends in
clear nail polish. Wait a few minutes for the
polish to get tacky, then roll between your
fingers.
• "To clean plastic,
vented hairbrushes, just stick them in the
dishwasher. You also can put toothbrushes in the
dishwasher periodically." -- E.L. in
Michigan
• "If you or your
child has a wood splinter, soak the finger/toe in
icy water. The water swells the wood, making it
easier to remove, while the iciness numbs the
area, making it less painful." -- R.D. in
Oregon
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Copyright 2011, Heritage
Publishing. All rights reserved.
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