A farmer walks into a lawyers office and
says: "Id like to get one of them-thar
day-vorce-ees" "Yes sir, I believe I can help
you" replied the lawyer. "Do you have any
grounds?" "Oh shore do!", exclaimed the
farmer, "Got me bout a 140 acres out back a the
house thar." "No no..., I mean do you have a
case?" asked the lawyer. "No sur," replied
the farmer, "I drive one of them John
Deers" "You dont understand,"
said the lawyer, "You need something like a
grudge." "Oh!!" said the farmer, "I
got me one of those! Thats what I park muh Deer
in!" The lawyer, a bit frustrated responded,
"Sir, youve got to have a reason to divorce
your wife. Does she beat you up or anything?"
"No sur", replied the farmer, "I purt near
get outta bed afore her ever mornin." Finally the
exasperated lawyer shouted, "WHY do you want a
divorce?" "Oh, well..." replied the
farmer, "She says we jus cant
When everything is coming your way,
youre in the wrong lane.
OK, so whats the speed of dark?
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Sues For Title.
Geo. Allen has brought suit in the
circuit court through his attorneys E. O. Brown and Geo.
P. Whitsett, against La Fayette Alexander and Mary
Baldwin, to perfect his title to the property in which he
resides, which is lot 165 in North Carthage. The
plaintiff sets forth that in 1892 he went to the
defendant Alexander and arranged with him to be his
attorney in applying for a divorce; that said defendant
told him he should put his real estate in third hands
which he did, deeding it to the said defendant, without
consideration and with the understanding that it was only
in trust. Since then the plaintiff says that he has been
unable to get his property back, and furthermore that
first mentioned defendant deeded it to second mentioned
defendant without consideration last April. Plaintiff now
prays the court to set aside both deeds alluded to, and
vest the title to the property in plaintiff as the
OFFICIAL ELECTION BALLOT
JASPER COUNTY, MISSOURI -
NOVEMBER 8, 2011
INSTRUCTIONS TO VOTERS
To vote, complete the arrow(s)
pointing to your choice(s), like this
Use marking device provided.
PROPOSITIONS: If you are in
FAVOR of the proposition or question, complete
the arrow next to the word YES. If you are
OPPOSED to the proposition or question, complete
the arrow next to the word NO.
Shall the City of Carthage
impose a sales tax of one-fourth (1/4) of one
percent (1%) for a period of time not to exceed
twenty (20) years for the purpose of providing
revenues for the operation of the Carthage Fire
County Jail Count
Including Placed out of County
If ya missed the Midwest
Gathering of the Artists auction, ya
missed quite a show. Not only the art work,
but the artistic talents of the auctioneer. I
havent seen more energy exhibited in
the attempt to engage an audience in a while.
I havent seen the numbers, but Id
have ta guess the overall sales of the
auction will be more than respectable. The
artists were pleased Im sure.
Course after 35 years, those who attend
expect a top notch performance.
There is a unique blend of
talents that bring the show together each
year. Bob Tommey, Danny Hensley, and Sandy
Higgins continue to amaze the artists and the
public with their outstandin jop of
puttin it all together. Along with the
help of numerous volunteers, it just keeps
This is some fact, but
Just Jake Talkin.
SENIOR NEWS LINE
by Matilda Charles
Is It Time to
In spite of our reputation, the
statistics say that we seniors arent bad
A 2010 report by the Insurance
Institute for Highway Safety says that,
"Contrary to expectations, senior drivers
arent causing more crashes than they used
to." Rates of crashes in drivers 70 and
older have actually declined.
The catch, however, is that we
must know when to stop or limit our driving. Once
we start making driving mistakes, the results can
range from merely annoying (having our driving
restricted) to catastrophic (a serious crash or
Ask yourself: Are other drivers
honking at you more lately? Have you hit a curb
or mailbox? Do you have a hard time backing up,
possibly because its difficult to turn
around in the seat? Do you wonder which way to go
at exit ramps? These might be signs that you need
to think about whether to continue driving.
There are tools and information
online to help you decide if you need to stop or
limit your driving.
www.hartfordauto.thehartford.com and search for
Crash Risk Assessment. Also look for Safety for
Older Drivers. Take the quiz for drivers age 50
Consider taking a senior driver
refresher course. Go to AARP.org (or call
1-888-227-7669) and look for Driver Safety
Program. Locate a class near you or sign up for
the online class. Classes are often held in
senior centers, adult education classes and
If youre concerned about
an elderly parent who is still driving, AARP has
put together an online seminar that helps explore
the topic. Go to AARP.org and search for "We
Need to Talk" or call the AARP number above.
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Publishing. All rights reserved.