The Mornin' Mail is published every weekday except major holidays
Wednesday, November 27, 2002 Volume XI, Number 115

did ya know?

Did Ya Know?. . .On Monday, Dec. 2nd a new McCune-Brooks Hospital Support Group will meet from 6-7 p.m. in the Skilled Activity Room, 3rd Floor. The topic is "Holiday Stress." Discussion will include depression, feeling overwhelmed and financial stress. Call 359-2316 for more info.

Did Ya Know?. . .The Carthage Public Library will close at 5 p.m. on Wed., Nov. 27th and be closed for Thanksgiving. Regular hours will resume Friday, Nov. 29th.

today's laugh

Drugstore clerk: "Did you kill any moths with those mothballs I sold you the other day?"
Customer: "No, I tried for hours and couldn’t hit one."

A man and woman met and married through a personal ad in the paper. Now there’s a problem: Every time he picks the paper off the porch, she thinks he’s cheating on her.

One cockroach runs into another in a drain. "Did you hear about the new restaurant?" says one roach. "It’s unbelievable — the refrigerator looks like polished silver, the shelves are clean as a whistle and —"
"Stop," says the other roach. "Not while I’m eating!"


A Chronological Record of Events as they have Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.


It was interesting to nate the sagacity of a bunch of milk cows at the Harrington dairy the other morning. There are now one hundred head of cattle at the dairy, and Maj. Harrington has recently added a new barn large enough to shelter the fifty which have been bought since last year.

When the last of the grass on the pasture was gone and the cows gathered under the sheds the other day, the big silos were opened for the first time. The sweet, soft smell of the silage flooded the sheds and the fifty old cows at once pricked up their ears and began to bawl uproariously. They knew what silage was. But the fifty new cows only looked on in wonder and uttered never a bawl. They had never tasted the sweets of silage, for the Harrington silos are the only ones in these parts. That the old cows had learned to like it was shown by their appreciative clamor when first they sniffed it since last winter.

  Today's Feature

Blunt Facts Coming.

Blunt Facts, the annual 12-page, newspaper insert that contains a complete record of the votes cast by Southwest Missouri Congressman Roy Blunt during the Second Session of the 107th Congress, will appear in every newspaper distributed in the Seventh Congressional District (except this one) during the week of November 25. Blunt Facts includes an explanation of the 253 recorded votes Congressman Blunt made this year.

"You don't have to guess how I voted. Every voted is listed in Blunt Facts," Blunt said, "Every recorded vote I made this year with a description of the bill, the reasons for my vote and the outcome of the vote can be found in Blunt Facts." Again this year, the Franking Commission, a bipartisan watchdog committee that must approve such publications, said Blunt is one of only a handful of Members of Congress who annually publish their entire voting record. Blunt also posts for inspection his entire voting record covering nearly 2,300 votes cast during his six years in Congress on his web page (< Blunt was among the first members of Congress to make his voting record available on the Internet.

Blunt Facts includes pictures, informative stories, charts and graphs that are not easily displayed in other mass media. Newspaper inserts are also less costly than distribution by mail. Blunt Facts contains information about major pieces of legislation and articles about Blunt's elevation to Whip in the House leadership in the 108th Congress. The insert also details legislation passed by the House that the Senate has yet to act on.

Just Jake Talkin'


I can’t ever seem ta find a pencil when I’d really rather use one instead of the typical ball point. ‘Course if I do happen to get lucky enough to find the lead centered instrument, it’s eraser is worn to a nub. Guess folks usin’ pencils make more mistakes than the manufacturers recommended per pencil.

As a kid I always had those "extra" erasers that fits over the worn out one. And of course a large eraser that had a soft end and a get down to business end with some kinda sand in it. Good for punchin’ a hole right in the critical homework.

Now that calculators are the norm, I won’t be surprised if folks start thinkin’ of pencils as an antique utensil, sellin’ at the flea market for five bucks a throw.

At least then when I needed a pencil, I’d know where I could find it.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’.



Carthage Printing Services

Weekly Column


By Amy Anderson

December Is More Than Just Christmas

So, we’re coming up on the last month of the year. Perhaps you have the holiday spirit but are looking for something a little beyond the traditional December holidays — Hanukkah (Nov. 30 to Dec. 7), the Winter Solstice (Dec. 22), Christmas (Dec. 25) or Kwanzaa (beginning Dec. 26). Well, you are in luck, because December is a month of surprisingly charming little holidays. If you need a holiday right away, consult this list; it is guaranteed to give you SOMETHING to celebrate.

Dec. 1 — National Pie Day

Dec. 2 — National Fritters Day

Dec. 3 — Roof-Over-Your-Head Day

Dec. 4 — Wear Brown Shoes Day

Dec. 5 — National Sacher Torte Day

Dec. 6 — Mitten Tree Day

Dec. 7 — National Cotton Candy Day

Dec. 8 — Jim Morrison Day

Dec. 9 — National Pastry Day

Dec. 10 — Festival for the Souls of Dead Whales

Dec. 11 — National Noodle Ring Day

Dec. 12 — National Ding-A-Ling Day

Dec. 13 — Ice Cream and Violins Days

Dec. 14 — Bouillabaisse Day

Dec. 15 — National Lemon Cupcake Day

Dec. 16 — Chocolate-Covered Anything Day

Dec. 17 — Underdog Day

Dec. 18 — National Roast Suckling Pig Day

Dec. 19 — Oatmeal Muffin Day

Dec. 20 — Games Day

Dec. 21 — National Flashlight Day

Dec. 22 — National Date-Nut Bread Day

Dec. 23 — Roots Day

Dec. 24 — National Egg Nog Day

Dec. 25 — National Pumpkin Pie Day

Dec. 26 — National Whiners Day

Dec. 27 — National Fruitcake Day

Dec. 28 — Card Playing Day

Dec. 29 — Pepper Pot Day

Dec. 30 — National Bicarbonate of Soda Day

Dec. 31 — Unlucky Day

Thanks to the many bizarre-holiday Web sites out there.


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