If a Hottentot tot taught a Hottentot
tot to talk eer the tot could totter, ought the
Hottentot tot be taught to say aught, or naught, or what
ought to be taught her?
If to hoot and to toot a Hottentot tot
be taught by a Hottentot tutor, should the tutor get hot
if the Hottentot tot hoot and toot at the Hottentot
As the doorman ran down to open the
limousine door, he tripped and rolled down the last four
"For heavens sake, be
careful," cried the club manager, "theyll
think youre a member."
Jane - "Jack was at the masquerade
last night, but I couldnt tell him from Adam."
John - "My heavens! Did they dress
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Dorsey Shields Again.
Dorsey Shields, the man who alarmed
Galena recently by threatening to blow up the town with
$2 worth of dynamite which he carried under his arm and
waved promiscuously, arrived in Carthage Saturday night
gloriously drunk. Late that night he fell off a stool in
a restaurant and his left eye is completely closed in
consequence. His left hand is also badly wounded. A cut,
which he says he got splitting kindling while drunk,
extends across the back of the hand. He was locked up
over Sunday and this morning out of pity for what he had
been the police officers gave him hours to leave town
instead of fining him. He thanked Marshal Stafford
profusely and promised to leave at once, saying that he
didn't "care to meet any of his old friends looking
Arthur Alexander rode to Joplin Sunday
on his new Ariel bicycle, making the trip in one hour and
Parking Lot Bids Opened.
Bids for the parking lot south
of the police station were reviewed at the Public
Works Committee meeting Tuesday afternoon. Five
companies submitted bids, and all bids were above
the $30,000 budgeted for the project.
Base bids ranged from $56,063
to $84,500. These bids included the 6" base
rock, sidewalks on the south and east sides of
the lot, curbing, dumpster enclosure, ramp and a
retaining wall on the west side of the parking
lot. Each company also submitted two additional
bids for other work: one for lighting and one for
asphalt paving and parking bumpers.
Bids to install three 12'
street lights similar to those on the
Squares mall sidewalk ranged from $7,215 to
$9,950. Bids for paving and bumper blocks ranged
from $8,979 to $9,900.
The Engineering Department
recommended accepting only the low base bid of
$56,063 from Dalton Killinger of Joplin.
Assistant to the City Engineer Joe Butler
explained that the paving and parking bumpers
could be obtained more economically through the
City asphalt paving contract and the Street
Department at a cost near $8,000.
According to Butler, the large
discrepancy between the budgeted amount and the
bids is due in part to the time which lapsed
between budgeting and bidding the project and
also to the fact that originally the project did
not include features such as the sidewalks and
the dumpster enclosure.
Members of the Committee
suggested looking for less expensive lighting
"There are three telephone
poles on the south side of the street," said
Committee member Bill Johnson. "You could
probably use existing poles and electricity and
get as much safety--it would not be as
"I know Im always
preaching green space and aesthetics," said
Committee member Jackie Boyer, "but I think
in this instance, to light a parking lot, we can
do it for safety....The poles are going to be
there anyway, and if we could save the City some
money, we should."
Engineering agreed to check
with CW&EP about the feasibility of placing
flood lights directed toward the parking lot on
Discussion then turned to
financing the project.
Police Chief Ed Ellefsen has
$3,000 available in funds for Americans with
Disabilities Act (ADA) projects which can go
toward the cost of the ramp since it is required
Other funds needed above the
budgeted amount would come from reserves. Since
the project may run into the next fiscal year,
Johnson suggested that the full amount of the
project be requested in the council bill
authorizing the project and the $30,000 budgeted
this year not be spent. According to Johnson,
this would simplify the bookkeeping on the
The Committee voted to
recommend the low base bid and to request full
funding of the project, approximately $61,000, in
the necessary council bill.
Now that the election is
over, the real excitement comes for the newly
elected Council members and Mayor. Budget
sessions are scheduled to begin soon and the
pile of information that goes with it. A good
dose of meetins has been the order of
the day in the past few years.
There is also the matter of
the Mayors appointments to the various
committees. The most obvious and possibly
demandin vacancy to be filled is that
of Budget/Ways and Means Committee Chair.
Bill Johnson has held that position for
several years, but with his opting to not to
run for reelection, that spot will be an
Assignments for the
committees usually come soon after the
swearin portion of the installation of
new members Council meetin.
This year there seems ta be
a likelihood of the City Administrator
takin a larger role in the budget
process. Its time ta hit the floor
This is some fact, but
mostly, Just Jake Talkin.
Metcalf Auto Supply
Click and Clack Talk Cars
Dear Tom and Ray:
I have a question about my
husband's 1995 Ford Ranger. The Ranger has a
standard transmission and a four-cylinder engine.
When we put the Ranger into overdrive, the rpm
goes down but the engine loses power. In order to
climb a small hill, we must downshift to forth
gear. Is this normal? My old five-speed Honda
wasn't like that. Can you explain this to me?-
Ray: It's absolutely normal,
Denise. Especially when you have an engine that
is - in purely technical lingo - a real dog.
Tom: My brother doesn't mean
that in a bad way, Denise. He just means that
this particular four-cylinder engine is a little
on the small side for this particular truck.
Ray: It's also possible that
it's geared differently from the Honda, and the
Ranger's fifth gear is "taller" meaning
it slows the engine more to conserve fuel at the
expense of power.
Tom: Whatever the combination
of reason, when you get to a hill, you need the
added mechanical advantage of a lower gear to get
up it. And there's nothing wrong with that.
That's why they give you five different gears to
Ray: Your Honda, on the other
hand, may have had a similarly sized engine, but
it probably weighed 1,000 pounds less! That gave
it a higher horsepower-to-weight ratio (more
horsepower for every pound of car the engine was
Tom: So not to worry, Denise.
This is exactly what overdrive is supposed to do.
It's supposed to reduce the engine speed (and
save gas) when you're cruising on the highway and
don't need as much power.
Ray: And also give those
six-cylinder Ranger owners a chance to pass you
on hills and feel good about the extra money they
blew on their bigger engines.
Copyright 1997 by Heritage Publishing.
All rights reserved.