today's
laugh
"I saw the doctor today about my
loss of memory."
"What did he do?"
"Made me pay in advance."
A witness was asked to tell what he
found on the premises.
"Naught but barren nothingness, as
Shakespeare says," testified the witness.
"Never mind what Shakespeare
says!" commanded the court. "If he knows
anything about this case he can be summoned!"
"Why did you throw the pot of
geraniums at the plaintiff?"
"Because of an advertisement, your
honor."
"What advertisement?"
"Say it with flowers."
The lawyer called his clerk and said to
him: "Smith, you have been employed by me for five
years. To mark my appreciation of this you will now be
addressed as Mr. Smith."
1898
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Located by X Rays.
Saturday evening about 4 o'clock Frank
Skillen, a 12-year-old boy who lives at his parents' home
on Tenth street near Garrison avenue, accidentally shot
himself in the hand with a pistol.
The boy says that he had been playing
with the weapon and was just about to lay it on a shelf
when it was discharged, the 22-caliber ball lodging in
his left hand near the thumb. He screamed lustily and his
mother came to his aid and hurried him up town to a
surgeon.
Dr. Taylor took an X ray picture of the
hand and locating the bullet, cut directly to it. Young
Skillen will not be permanently injured by the wound.
Hear Edward Baxter Perry, the noted
blind pianist, at the Christian church next Tuesday
evening.
| |
Today's Feature Willis Vs. Jasper County.
The debate over the correct
salary for the County Assessor Jim Willis, at a
stand-off for over a year, will soon move out of
the Courthouse hallways and into the Circuit
Court Chambers. Attorney James Fleischaker,
representing Willis, filed petition for
declaratory judgment late last Monday afternoon.
In the petition, Willis asks
for a judgment declaring that he was entitled to
receive the sum of $4,083.33 per month for the
months of September through December, 1997, and
that he is entitled to receive the sum of $4,250
per month beginning in 1998.
Willis began taking the full
$4,250 per month in September, 1997, citing a
State statute that raised the maximum allowable
salary, based on valuation. The petition concedes
that because the County's valuation was at a
lower level at that time, the amount should have
been no more than $4,083.33.
The County Commission voted to
stop paying Willis more than the $3,033.33 per
month beginning January 1, 1999 after County
Counslor Jim Spradling advised that the County
Salary Commission had not authorized the increase
when it met after the State statute came into
effect.
|
 |
Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
The dad of a high school
friend a mine always used ta tell him that it
didn't cost anymore ta keep the top half of
his '57 Chevy's gas tank full than it did the
bottom half. 'Course he owned a gas station.
I once ran out of gas and
coasted to a halt directly in front of a
driveway just as the lady (?) drove up ta
pull in that particular drive. "If ya
can't afford the gas, ya shouldn't own
it," she comforted, in a snide voice.
And, of course, my
granddad's observation that it's not the
initial cost of a diner table, it's the
upkeep that's expensive.
Then the classic,
"Don't look a gift horse in the
mouth," and I would add, "unless ya
have ta feed it."
All a these pearls of
wisdom will no doubt be considered as the
City looks at options for the rejuvenated
Memorial Hall. It's a good, grand plan, now
it's just a matter of what it's really worth
to the community.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin'.
|
| Sponsored by
Carthage Printing Services
|
Weekly Column
Intro to the Internet.
The World
Wide Web
The World Wide Web is the most
talked about component of the Internet today. It
is also the one component of the Internet that is
advancing ( in terms of technology) the fastest.
As you travel from place to place, information is
constantly being transferred back and forth
between client and server computers.
While you’re
"surfing" the World Wide Web, you use
Hypertext Links (Some time called Hot Links) to
quickly travel from one location to another.
These links change colors after
you click on them. This makes it easier for you
to keep track of where you’ve been. In
addition, these links could take you anywhere.
Clicking on a hypertext link could connect you to
another town, state, or even country.
Of course, links aren’t
the only way to connect to another location. Each
World Wide Web site has its own individual
address. You’ve probably seen commercials on
television where they show an address that; looks
something like
‘htt://www.company.com/’. This is the
World Wide Web Address of that company. The real
name for this address in Uniform Resource Locator
(or URL) and you can easily access that
particular company by typing the address directly
in the location field on your browser.
ARCHIVES Index
|
| |
|
Copyright 1997 by Heritage Publishing.
All rights reserved.
|