The Mornin' Mail is published every weekday except major holidays
Wednesday, January 2, 2008 Volume XVI, Number 138

did ya know?

Did Ya Know?... Curbside cleanup of fallen branches will begin January 2 and end February 1. Limbs will be collected only from the City right-of-way, directly behind the curb line. No collections will be made from private property.

Did Ya Know?... The City Council Public Works Committee will meet Thursday, January 3 at 4:00 p.m. in the Public Works Department, 623 E. 7th to hear an update on removal of storm debris.

today's laugh

On which side of the church should the parents of the bride and the bridegroom be seated?
On opposite sides and as far apart as possible. A church is no place to start anything.

That mouth organ you gave me for my birthday is easily the best present I’ve ever had.
I’m glad you like it.
Yes - mother gives me a quarter a week not to play it.

You don’t mean to tell me that fish are musical?
Certainly. Haven’t you heard of the piano tuna?

Why do they put so many holes in Swiss cheese when it’s the Limburger that really needs the ventilation?

A Chronological Record of Events as they have Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.

Oh For An Indian Club!

And Echo Answers: "O, for a Lodge in Some Vast Wilderness."

"Which shall it be John, which shall it be?"
I smiled at John, and John frowned at me.
"We must give up, as you know, my dear,
A club and a lodge, first of the year."
Tourist, Cosmos, or N.N.C.,
Shakespeare, Alpha, or F.A.C.,
Bellet-lettres, Chautauqua, Q.C.,
Or the W.T.S.C.,
Whist, German, W.R.C.,
W.T.C.U., Coterie,
Morning Music, C.L.S.C.,
Century, golf or Q.D.P.?"
As John selected which I should leave,
I thought of the lodge he might relieve.
Woodmen, Masons, or A.O.P.,
Odd Fellows, Elks - (B.P.O.E.),
Select Knights of every degree,
Shriners, G.A.R., S of V.,
Court of Honor, or Maccabees,
S.K.L.A., or plumed K.T.’s,
John Marshall Law club, K. of P.,
Royal Court, or A.O.R. G.?
"Alas!" John cried, "but there is the rub!
Must I quit a lodge - you quit a club?
I’ll form a new lodge! (John gave a cheer)
You start a new club - first of the year!"


Today's Feature

Humane Society Accepts Agreement.

The Carthage Humane Society during last week’s meeting unanimously agreed to accept a settlement that would end a lawsuit filed against the Society by the Missouri Attorney General’s office. The lawsuit was filed in December of 2006 citing allegations of lack of financial control, gross mismanagement and animal abuse at the Humane Society.

The agreement requires more accurate book-keeping including annual budgets and review of all expenses more than $100. All financial reports of expenses and revenues must also be compiled and turned in to the Attorney General every six months. The agreement also calls for records to be kept on the acquisition and disposition of animals and the humane treatment of all animals.

David Angle, assistant to Attorney General Jay Nixon, described Nixon’s position on the agreement.

"We’ve got some monitoring provisions in the document, mostly dealing with financial and transparency issues that have been improved on," said Angle. " And I think the provisions of the consent judgement will continue in that improvement. Things, going forward, such as creating monthly expenditure reports that comply with certain accounting rules and practices. Maintaining IRS filings going forward....those are things that go forward. As long as they’re complied with in the future we will be satisfied and remain satisfied."

Just Jake Talkin'
People get over the uneasy feelin’s a couple days after New Year’s. It’s back to the grind and thoughts of the first spring days a comin’. Some preparin’ for the eventual agony or relief of the football season bein’ over.

I thought I had a surefire method figured out for beatin’ this New Year’s resolution thing. I resolved to not make any resolution. ‘Course the fact that I made the resolution immediately contradicted itself. The only way to get away from makin’ resolutions is to not be conscious that they are there in the first place. Hard to do when ever’one seems ta be intent on askin’ what your resolutions are.

Who started that, anyway? If any of us were really serious ‘bout makin’ changes, we’d prob’ly already have been doin’ it.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’.

Mornin' Mail

Here's A Tip
By JoAnn Derson

The Very Best Tips of 2007

• "After the rush of the holidays, our family has a little tradition of its own. We reserve one night to watch all our home movies from the season. We usually end up watching some of the other years’ too. And our son has become a whiz at putting together slideshows on DVD of digital pictures, so we look forward to the first of many photo slideshows to add to the night’s entertainment." -- Y.K. in Alabama

• "I usually get plastic bags when grocery shopping, but I have the bagger package all frozen foods together in a paper bag. The bag is easily identifiable so it can be taken inside and put away first." -- A.D. in Washington

• "To keep the fabric belts on my daughters’ shorts and pants in place, I stitched the center of the belt to the back loop of the garment. The bow never pulls to one side, or falls off! It’s great for keeping them with the right pair of pants or shorts." -- O.S. in Wisconsin

• "If you have small children, you might want to keep a red washcloth in your first-aid kit. Sometimes, the sight of blood can upset a child out of proportion with the injury. If you use a red washcloth, blood won’t show and you can spend your time calming the hurt, not the emotion." -- School nurse in Arizona

• "I hang two mesh laundry bags from the back of the bathroom door. Bras and undergarments go into one, socks in the other. I toss them in the wash just as they are, and no sorting is required after they are done." -- D.C. in Mississippi

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